Total pages in book: 132
Estimated words: 128742 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 644(@200wpm)___ 515(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128742 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 644(@200wpm)___ 515(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
And the fact that the choice isn’t clear in my mind in this instant means I can’t honestly say what my heart wants.
“Baby?” he says huskily. “What do you think?”
I think that if he calls me baby again, I’m liable to melt in a puddle on this beer-stained floor.
Instead, I swallow hard and say, “If I say no to Budapest, is summer off the table?”
He smiles wryly. “I take that to mean you’re saying no to Budapest?”
“I think so.” I nod regretfully. “Yeah, I’m saying no. Not because I don’t want to go. I desperately want to go. But…it’s too short notice. And you’ve thrown me for a loop here. I need more than a couple days to articulate the jumbled mess of thoughts that are fogging up my brain.”
He nods back. “It was worth a try. And to answer your question, summer is still very much on the table. You know…before I met you, my only goal was to save as much money as I could and see the world. Collect experiences. Never wanted to be tied down or corralled while I did that. And now…”
I can scarcely breathe. “And now what?”
“Now I’m recognizing the value of having someone along for the ride. Someone you’re passionate about. I meant what I said, Abbey. I’ve fallen for you. I’ve fallen bloody hard.”
A smile tugs on my lips.
“With that said…I’ll still see you when I get back, right?” He reaches for my hand again, rubbing his thumb across my wrist. It’s a gesture I’ve come to understand as his way of saying I’d be trying to take your pants off right now if we weren’t in public.
“Definitely.”
He flashes that cheeky smile. “And in case you change your mind, I don’t leave until early Saturday morning. Flight’s at four a.m. Find me at the airport if you reconsider.”
After leaving Nate’s bar, I find myself on a bus bench and entirely disoriented. For a moment, I’m not even sure where I am. I just started down the sidewalk and kept going for several blocks until I looked up and didn’t recognize my surroundings. According to my phone map, I’m farther east than I’ve ever ventured through the city on foot.
Out of breath and a bit overwhelmed, I slouch and stare at the traffic until the noise and car exhaust quiet my frantic thoughts.
I’ve spent months in limbo, suspended between disparate paths. Struggling with a decision that feels like not just a choice between two guys but two vastly different interpretations of myself. Now, the status quo is collapsing beneath my feet, and if I don’t grab for one of their ropes, I’m committing to finding out what’s at the bottom on my own. Which I guess is a choice in itself. Maybe even the one that risks the fewest hearts.
I need a sounding board. Grabbing my phone from my purse, I send an SOS to Eliza.
Me: I’m back in the love triangle. Help.
Her response is instantaneous. It’s early evening in Nashville, and I imagine she’s just returned to her dorm after dinner at the meal hall on campus.
Eliza: Were you ever out of it?
Me: Yes. I told both of them to fuck off. But now they both want me as their girlfriend.
Me: Is this how the Kardashians feel?
Eliza: Wait, you forgave Hot Jack? And Drifter Nate wants to settle down? Is this an alternate dimension?
Me: Right??
Me: So what do I do?
Eliza: Pick one.
Me: Gee. Wow. That is some transcendent advice. Thank you.
A moment later, she calls me. I pick up instantly, groaning in lieu of hello.
“Okay, catch me up,” Eliza orders. “How did all these new developments come to pass?”
“Well, I just saw Nate at his bar, and he invited me to Budapest for spring break.”
“Wow.”
“After he told me he’s in love with me.”
“Double wow.”
“Yeah.”
“And you said Hot Jack’s also back in the picture? Please don’t tell me he got down on one knee.”
“No, but basically. He asked me to come to Sydney to meet the family and be his girlfriend.”
“The nerve.”
“Right?”
Eliza’s amused chuckle tickles my ear. “Okay, so what are you going to do?”
“Well, I turned down both trip offers but not the rest of it.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning I forgave Jack and told him I’d consider making things official between us. And I told Nate I’d consider going away for the entire summer with him.”
“Aren’t you ambitious.” She laughs again before her tone becomes serious. “What choice are you leaning toward?”
“If I had the answer to that, I wouldn’t be sitting on a bench at midnight bothering your ass.”
“Good point. Then we make a list. Pros and cons.”
“Doesn’t that seem a little…dispassionate?”
“Because you’ve done so well without my help?” Eliza snickers when I don’t answer. “Thought so. Never question my methods.”
So we do it her way. I arrange for an Uber and then, while I wait for it, Eliza and I make a list. Matching Jack’s steadiness against Nate’s spontaneity.