Series: Fever Falls Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 96
Estimated words: 92704 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 371(@250wpm)___ 309(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92704 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 371(@250wpm)___ 309(@300wpm)
I picked up my journal, leafed through the pages again, but it suddenly felt wrong in my hands.
I heard a rustling of leaves and looked over my shoulder to see—“Oh, hey, Jude. This is a surprise.” I didn’t even know Jude knew about this little spot, but I guessed it would make sense that he did.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt. I didn’t expect anyone to be here.”
“It’s fine.” I patted the ground beside me. “Have a seat.” I hadn’t spent much time—if any—with Jude one-on-one. The only person he did that with outside of Linc and Rush was Cam. Not that he hadn’t found himself a place within our group of friends, because he had. It just seemed like Jude maybe didn’t open up to people quite as easily, and I understood that.
“Thanks, man.” He took a seat beside me. His feet were flat on the ground, his arms around his knees. “It’s relaxing out here. I like it.”
“Yeah, Cam and I used to swim here all the time when we were kids.”
“He told me.”
It definitely seemed that the two of them were really close. I figured Cam must have brought him here.
Jude ran a hand through his brown hair. I was still adjusting to his new color, which I guess was really his natural color. “How you doing?” he asked, and I knew he meant because of Carter. I could hear it in his voice.
“Taking it day by day,” I replied honestly. I hadn’t talked to our friends about it, not even Camden, but for some reason, sitting at the falls with Jude, I couldn’t hold back. “I miss him. I’ve never been in love before, ya know?” I thought I’d loved Julian, but I hadn’t. This feeling I had for Carter was completely unique to him, to us.
“Did you tell him how you feel?” Jude asked.
“Not in those words, no.”
“You should. If not, it ends up being too late.”
I couldn’t help but be curious if he was speaking from personal experience. “Yeah, but what if it changes things? What if I tell him, and he decides to pass up this opportunity and comes back to Fever Falls? Or we stick it out, and the distance and time apart eat away at us? I don’t want him to resent me. He should have this time.” I didn’t want him in Fever Falls for me. I wanted Carter to do what he wanted, what was best for him.
“No offense, man, but those sound like excuses to me.”
“Are you speaking from experience?” tumbled out of my mouth.
“Not about resentment, no, but about keeping my mouth shut…kind of? I don’t know. I’m over it, and I know everything turned out the way it was supposed to be. I’m not even sure I really loved this person, but now, if I wondered if I loved someone, if I thought I might, I’m not sure I could keep it to myself. You only live once, right?”
“YOLO.” I smiled a smile I didn’t feel.
“Anyway, that shit’s over and done with. I didn’t mean to go all dark.”
Chuckling, I leaned over and nudged him with my arm. And then…I opened my mouth and a thought I hadn’t truly allowed myself to admit came tumbling out. “I thought about going to LA, if he wanted me. I never mentioned it to him, and I’d have to figure out what to do with Fearless, but if it meant having him, I’d do it.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I grasped how fucking true they were. I hated big cities, and I loved Fever Falls. I loved my life here, but I loved Carter too. I loved him more.
“Wow…” Jude glanced over and cocked a brow. “No shit?”
“No shit. It’s just a thought. He might not want that anyway.” He needed to focus on his career and not have to worry about me.
“Cam would lose it.”
“Cam would be just fine.”
Little wrinkles formed as Jude looked at me, but then he turned and said, “Yeah, I guess so, but he loves you. You’re his best friend. I think maybe you believe you need Cam more than he needs you.”
My pulse sped up. “Did he say that to you?”
“Nope. He didn’t have to.”
“You and my brother are very close.” I’d known they were spending a lot of time together, obviously, but this conversation made it evident that they were even closer than I’d realized.
“He’s a good buddy.” Jude chuckled. “Even if he is annoying as shit and calls me beautiful.”
“Well…you have to admit you are.” With that sun-kissed skin, blue eyes, and dark hair of his, Jude was a knockout.
“Oh God. Not you too.”
We laughed together. I really did like Jude. He was good for Camden, and I was glad they had their friendship.
“Anyway, I’ll let you go.” Jude pushed to his feet. “Are you going to Beau and Ash’s tonight?”