Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 95906 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 480(@200wpm)___ 384(@250wpm)___ 320(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95906 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 480(@200wpm)___ 384(@250wpm)___ 320(@300wpm)
“Then why?” I shouted, not caring who could be within hearing distance. I wanted some answers and I wanted them now, damn it.
Con didn’t respond at first. When he did, I instantly regretted the question because when he looked at me, his eyes were filled with nothing but pain and regret. “Why was I outside your house tonight?” he asked. “Or why did I do what I did to Brady?”
The second question was a punch to the gut, but I managed to stifle the whimper of pain that bubbled up from my throat.
“Why did I bring you back here?” he murmured. “Why didn’t I man up and make sure you were okay all those years ago—”
“No!” I snapped. “Why…why—” I tried to get the words out but they kept getting stuck at the back of my throat. It didn’t help when Con finally turned to face me, and it definitely didn’t help when he stepped closer to me so that only a few inches were separating us. And it sure as shit didn’t help when he tipped my chin up so I was forced to meet his gaze.
“Why can’t I seem to stop touching you?” he asked softly, though it was a question he was clearly asking himself.
I desperately wanted the answer to that very question, but I was too caught up in whatever spell his touch was weaving over me. Why can’t I seem to tell you to stop?
Thankfully, by sheer force of will, I managed not to ask that particular question out loud.
“Why is it so easy for you to let us go?” I blurted before I could stop myself. As soon as the words were out, I wanted to call them back. That question had been tucked away in some dark part of my mind that I’d closed off a long time ago… the part where I’d dreamed of someone stepping into that room with me and Barry and pulling the man off me. The part where I’d prayed for someone to intervene when Ricky realized he hadn’t really spent the entire monthly guilt check on drugs and was certain I’d been stashing some of it.
No, not someone. I hadn’t wanted someone to rescue me. I knew that. It was a truth I’d hidden away in that same dark place in my head.
I’d wanted this man to save me.
Humiliation coursed through me the instant I realized I’d spoken the forbidden words aloud but when I tried to jerk away from Con, his fingers curled around the back of my neck and I ended up pressed against his chest. I couldn’t risk looking at him, so I dropped my eyes and focused on his throat. The mere sight of his pulse point pounding beneath his skin was strangely comforting. So were the fingers gripping my neck. I could have easily escaped his hold, but I didn’t want to.
God help me, I didn’t want to.
“Why do you think I’m out on this fucking balcony, Micah?” Con growled. He’d dropped his head so that his lips were practically caressing my ear. His voice sent shivers up and down my spine and despite the heavy veil of painkillers I was still slogging through, my cock began to respond to his closeness.
I shook my head because I didn’t know how to answer him. Hell, I could barely make sense of the words.
“Because it’s the only place in the entire fucking apartment where you can lock me out. It’s the only place you’re completely safe from me.” There was a brief pause and then I swore I felt Con’s lips brush the shell of my ear at the same time that he drew in a breath, like he was trying to inhale my scent.
His words should have frightened me, but they didn’t. To my own shame, I heard myself letting out a soft sob… of relief, of joy, of excitement, I wasn’t sure. It didn’t really matter because it broke the spell.
“Go back to bed, Micah. We’ll figure things out in the morning.”
I wanted to tell him there was nothing to figure out. I had a plan, and I would damn well follow through on it. I just needed the fog of drugs to clear and then all this stupid emotional shit would be gone, and the kids and I would be on our way to a new life… the life I’d promised them.
The life I’d been promised so long ago.
I felt strangely adrift as Con released me and stepped back. I somehow managed to turn my back on him and then I was stumbling back into the living room. But I didn’t stop to grab my backpack, just like I didn’t stop to lock the bedroom door behind me. I didn’t even consider the fact that I still had Con’s blanket wrapped around my body until I crawled into his big bed and drew it even tighter around me and lost myself in his scent.