Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 77930 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77930 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Chase held my gaze, something flashing behind his eyes. “And being bad felt good?”
I sighed. “Being bad feels really, really good sometimes,” I murmured.
Something flared in my chest as I admitted it to him. I knew I was saying things I normally would never say. I was pretty damn tipsy now, but I was pretty sure I’d be saying all of this to Chase tonight anyway, after finding out he was ChillyIcyBlue.
I had nothing to lose. Usually, in social interactions, I was so deeply afraid to make a fool out of myself, but with Chase, I’d already felt like the world’s biggest fool earlier tonight.
I had nowhere else to mess up, so for the first time, I actually felt free.
“I like being bad, too,” Chase said, “but I don’t think that’ll come as any surprise.”
“You don’t seem bad, to me,” I offered. “Flirty, sure. A little cocky. But everyone likes that.”
“And I take it as a huge compliment,” he said, making a little motion like he was dusting his shoulders off as he smiled. “Now that I can be open about this stuff, too, I can say what I’ve really wanted to say the whole time. You use your cell phone camera for your videos, right? I have a couple of professional digital cameras at home that you can absolutely borrow for some super high-quality stuff. I can help you with angles and lighting, too.”
I leaned my head back on the chair. “Are you seriously giving me advice on my cumshot videos right now?”
“Why the hell not?” he protested. “Adam, I’m a camera guy. I’ve been filming things for my entire adult life and the better part of my childhood, too. We could film some incredible stuff together.”
My blood ran hot.
“The idea of another person being in the same room while I film my videos is completely unimaginable.”
Chase’s eyes smoldered as he looked at me, shrugging one shoulder. “Strictly business, right?”
My heart thudded in my chest and my cock strained against my pants. “Strictly business,” I repeated, swallowing.
“I’m a professional, Adam,” Chase said. “It’s not like I would stand there jerking off behind the camera while I filmed you—”
“Oh, God,” I groaned.
“Unless you wanted me to, of course.”
“Shut up. I hate you,” I said, pushing my palms against my eyes. “No. I don’t hate you. I like you, actually, probably way more than I should, and… fuck, now I’m rambling and I’m actually starting to get drunk.”
Chase let out a sweet laugh that floated down toward the street. “I like you, too,” he said. “We don’t have to talk about it now. But trust me when I say it would be a dream come true. Hang on, I’m going to get you a glass of water.”
He disappeared inside and for a moment I was left alone with my thoughts. It was disorienting to realize that in the time since realizing Chase knew my secret, I’d only started to rapidly feel more comfortable around him, not less.
What the fuck was that about?
Should I have been spending my life trying to be more of a freak around people instead of always trying to blend in? Or was Chase really just someone special, who could make anybody feel like they belonged?
He reappeared on the balcony a minute later with a tall glass of water and a bowl full of cut up watermelon.
“That looks so good right now,” I said.
“All yours.”
I reached for a piece of watermelon and popped it in my mouth, the cool sweetness hitting my tongue. “Now that’s the good kind of childhood memory. Me, outside in my parents’ backyard, reading a book in summer with a bowl of watermelon.”
He sighed. “You were reading books by the pool as a kid, while I was busy trying to call every kid in my neighborhood and ask if they’d go to the beach with me.”
“The beach?” I asked, eating another piece of watermelon.
He nodded. “I grew up in a small beach town in California.”
“Sounds really nice.”
“Stellara Beach was pretty damn poor when I was growing up, but now it’s being turned into fancy-shmancy gyms and restaurants just like the rest of the coast. My mom and my brother Jamie still live there.”
“So it was tough, but beautiful,” I said. “I always wished I had a beach nearby growing up.”
I made eye contact with Chase, watching the glow of the street highlight his features. A wave of affection for him crashed down on me like a waterfall, all at once.
He was beautiful. Inside and out. And while I expected to feel embarrassed looking in his eyes, instead I realized all at once that we were sitting here having one of the smoothest conversations ever, when five minutes ago I’d been ready to metaphorically toss in the towel for the rest of my life.
He knew me.