Total pages in book: 108
Estimated words: 103010 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 343(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103010 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 343(@300wpm)
I groaned, rested my elbows on the table, and ran my hands over my face. I could do this. It really wasn’t that hard. “I’m in love with him,” I admitted. See? I’d said it, and the earth hadn’t opened up and swallowed me whole.
“Um…no shit?”
“Fuck you.”
He laughed again. “Sorry. I should be more supportive. I’m guessing this information is newer to you than to me.”
“Remind me why I’m friends with you again?”
“Because I understand you and once in a while let you beat me and fuck me?” he teased, but no, it wasn’t those things at all. It was that David had always been a good friend. He had never pushed me unless I needed to be pushed, but still never too far. Maybe it was the Dom in him that knew how far to test me. “Are you still afraid you don’t know how to love him? Because you do, Aidan. That boy adores you, and you love him and take care of him every single day.”
“It’s…difficult.” The truth was there, at the tip of my tongue, and I thought maybe I was going to set it free. I needed to do that. I understood it. I needed to be able to trust. I’d done that with Finley, and I should do it more with David as well. And I thought maybe it would make me better for Finley, and that made it all worthwhile. “I don’t want to get into a lot of details, but my childhood wasn’t the best. My father was mean, possessive. He liked to have my mother under his thumb, and not in a good way. I wasn’t what he wanted in a son, but she…she and my sisters. I loved them. I lost all three of them in a car accident. I’m the only one who survived.”
“Jesus Christ, Aidan. How am I just hearing about this?” He leaned forward and put a hand on my arm.
“Because I’m emotionally stunted?” I tried to make light of it, but he didn’t take the bait. He gave me a sad look, like he felt sorry for me, and I hated pity. “Anyway, I stopped caring about anyone or anything after that.”
David frowned. “You really believe that, don’t you? Jesus, these fucking Doms.”
“You’re a Dom.”
“Yeah, but I’m not an idiot one. You care. If you didn’t, you never would have intervened at the restaurant that night. You never would have taken Finley home and given him more than that boy has probably ever had. Patients love you. It amazes me how much. You are so good to them, even though you’re often a stoic asshole outside of the hospital.”
I couldn’t argue with that last statement. It was a fair assessment of me.
“I could name a thousand other ways I see you, and have seen you, care and love people over the years. Hell, you keep these dinners with me, even on days you’d rather not. Don’t sell yourself short, Aidan. That’s an order.” He winked.
“Did you mistake me for a switch?”
He chuckled. “I’m serious. Get out of your head and open your eyes.”
“I’m trying,” I admitted. “Fin makes me want to try.”
“That’s the first time I’ve heard you call him that.”
I frowned. I hadn’t even realized I’d said it. He was right. If I used his name, I always called him Finley.
“He’s a very lucky boy, Aidan. Any man would be to belong to you.”
I nodded, feeling like I was going to bust out of my skin. “Thank you…but can we stop now? I think I’m getting hives.”
David laughed again, and a second later I joined him.
“Yep. Definitely happier now. He even has jokes.”
I rolled my eyes, but I was smiling.
We didn’t speak about anything of consequence for the rest of the meal. I really couldn’t believe what I had shared with him, but a part of me was glad I had.
I spent the drive home thinking about Finley, of what he had shared with me about his mom and his wish for a family. That wasn’t something I could give him. Mine were all dead, except for my father, whom I had nothing to do with. I didn’t want children of my own. I didn’t know if he did either. The more I thought about it, the more I considered his blood relatives. His mother was gone, and apparently his grandparents wanted nothing to do with him. But there was a possibility he had more people out there than he knew about.
It was still on my mind when I got home. Ian was already gone, and Finley was sitting on the floor at the coffee table, doing homework. He moved to come to me, but I shook my head. “Stay.”
He nodded and smiled. “Yes, Sir.”
I made my way over and sat on the couch. He gave me those cute puppy-dog eyes that I was nearly powerless against. I playfully rolled my eyes, but honestly, I loved that he always wanted to be close to me, that my touch meant so much to him. “Come here.”