Total pages in book: 150
Estimated words: 136791 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 684(@200wpm)___ 547(@250wpm)___ 456(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 136791 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 684(@200wpm)___ 547(@250wpm)___ 456(@300wpm)
"As a heart attack," he says, his expression solemn. "I loved getting to share that with you. I felt like it was something just for us. I fell in love with literature because of you." A gentle smile tugs at his lips even as sadness and regret float through his eyes. "I haven't read a single book since I left Los Angeles. Just thinking about reading made me feel like I was going to fall the fuck apart. I missed you every damn day, baby girl. Every day."
"I don't read much anymore either," I admit. "Every book I picked up reminded me of you. I missed you so much."
"But you kept this one."
"I will never get rid of it."
He sets the book aside and then scoops everything else back into the box, and closes it before setting it on the floor beside the bed. Once that's done, he picks me up and pulls the blankets back before scooting up against the headboard and laying me down with my head on his chest. As soon as I'm comfortable, he picks the book up and flips it to the first page.
"Are you going to read it to me?" I ask, laughing in delight.
"Damn straight," he growls, reaching for my hand. He lifts it to his lips to kiss the ring there before twining our fingers together on his chest. "I'm going to read to you every fucking day for the rest of your life. And don't worry, baby girl. The only monster that's going to get you at the end of this book is me."
"My Grover," I whisper, smiling so big my cheeks hurt.
"Hi, Mama. Hi, Titan," I whisper a week later, clinging to Cade's hand as we stand between their graves. "I'm sorry I've never come to see you. I should have come a long time ago, but I didn't want to face that you were gone. I've struggled for a long time with losing you guys. I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I'm sorry I gave up on living after I lost you. I want you to know that I never forgot you. I never stopped missing you."
My throat burns, and unshed tears prickle at my eyes as I talk to them. I haven't been here since the day we buried them.
Their graves have grown over with grass and flattened out. Both my mom and Titan's graves have fresh flowers in vases. Judging by the layer of older petals, someone has been keeping flowers here for a long time. I have a feeling that's Cade's doing, but I let him keep that secret.
"I love you both and miss you so much," I whisper.
"Hi, Jana. Titan," Cade says at my side, his voice a soft rumble. There's a hitch in his voice, and their names tremble on his lips. He stands beside me for a second, not speaking, and then he releases me and kneels in the grass beside Titan's grave.
I clamp my hand over my mouth, trying to hold back a sob when he leans forward and presses his forehead to Titan's headstone. His shoulders shake, an anguished cry breaking from his lips. "I'm so fucking sorry, Titan."
I drop carefully to my knees beside him and wrap my body around his, holding him as he falls apart.
"I'm sorry," he says over and over as tears pour down his face. "I wish I could have saved you. You were my brother. I fucking miss you every goddamn day." He drops down on his ass and pulls me into his arms, holding me as he talks to my brother. Tears choke him, but he talks anyway, purging himself of years of grief, regret, and guilt. He tells Titan everything…but I kind of think Titan already knows.
I think that, maybe, he's been watching over both of us, trying to lead us back to one another.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there for her when she needed me," Cade says, stroking his hands through my hair. "I promise you that I'll never let her down like that again. I'll never leave her side. I'll never give up on her. I'll never stop loving her. She'll be taken care of, Titan. I promise you that I'll love her right this time."
"Cade," I whisper as another flood of tears pours down my face.
"Remember what you said when I told you that I kissed her for the first time?" he asks, smiling through his tears. "You told me that she deserved to be treated like a princess, and that I'd answer to you if I didn't treat her that way. I didn't tell you then, but I was so fucking afraid I wouldn't be good enough for her and would disappoint both of you." He exhales softly. "I'll always work to be good enough for her. I'll always try to keep my promise to you to treat her like she deserves to be treated. I just wish like hell you could be here to see me do it."