Total pages in book: 77
Estimated words: 73817 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 369(@200wpm)___ 295(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73817 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 369(@200wpm)___ 295(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
Mars lifts her head and makes a face. “So we’re all, like, inherently evil or something?”
“Not really. Maybe more inherently playful. Inherently childlike and impulsive and yearning for chaos.” Toby puts more salsa onto his plate, then frowns. “Hmm, it does … kinda sound evil, thinking of it that way.”
“What do you think, Seany?” asks Mars. “Oops, sorry, I meant Sean. Old habit.”
I was in the middle of picking out my next tortilla chip when she asks. I snatch the perfect one, then thoughtfully gaze at it as I consider my answer. “I think about all of the different people I’ve met out there. What they want. What they’re willing to do to get it. Whether they’re inherently good or bad people.” I frown. “I’ve seen what desperation does to good people. I mean, people always want to insist they’re good and honest, but if you put anyone in a terrible enough situation, you’d be surprised what they’re willing to do to survive.”
Mars winces. “So you think we’re all evil inside?”
I stare at the chip for a long time.
Toby puts a hand on my back. “It’s okay, Sean. It’s all just hypothetical fun. Don’t need to think too much about it. Maybe Vann just draws demons because they’re cool.”
I look up at him, shaken out of my thoughts, and smile.
I’m still thinking about demons and good and evil after Vann picks me up to take me to the gig. I’m thinking about it after taking off my shirt and posing for the camera. Each time the camera flashes, I feel like a different demon in one of Vann’s twisted, beautiful art pieces.
It’s a weird feeling. To be so happy with my life.
And yet with every happy day I have, there are a dozen of unhappy days that had to pass to get me here. Days of fear. Days of hunger. Days where I would have considered doing terrible things to survive. And days where I watched others do terrible things.
There might live a little demon inside each of us.
A demon that Vann loves to turn into art, to bring out onto the canvas, to expose for the world.
But I’m determined now more than ever to be stronger than the demon inside me. I must commit to my beautiful life with Cooper and take hold of and enjoy as many good days as I can. Eventually, I want to proudly say I have got more beautiful days in my life than bad ones. Beautiful days like today, where I didn’t have a care in the world except hanging out at the arcade with friends, stuffing my face with chips and salsa at Desert Moon Diner, and riding the back of Vann’s motorcycle to work a modeling gig.
And beautiful nights where I come home to Cooper.
The moment Vann drops me off at home, I find Coop standing there ready to greet me. “Did you have fun?”
I rush up to him and let his arms wrap around me. My safe space. My protector. My warmth.
He chuckles warmly. “I take that as a yes.”
I peer up into his eyes. “Tonight’s a movie night.”
“Oh, is it?” He strokes my hair. “What kind of movie? You pick.”
“You always make me pick.”
“Because you always pick the best movies.”
I bite my lip. My heart flutters happily. I grab hold of his waist and pull him against me for a kiss. His breath is warm against my face. I feel his grip tightening around me as our kiss deepens. Then my hands slide down his back to take two meaty handfuls of his ass. He does the same, and his hands grip me so tightly, I feel my cheeks spread as he lifts me up off the ground. He takes me to his bedroom and places me on the bed like a prince, before then peeling off my clothes like they’re in the way, piece by piece, until not even a sock remains.
I never pick a movie.
We never make it to watching one at all.
An hour and a half later, we’re naked and sweaty. Our bodies are sprawled out on his bed, clothes scattered all over the floor, and from his window whistles the sweetest night breeze from off the beach.
“There’s only one thing that could’ve made today even more perfect,” I murmur as we enjoy our afterglow.
“Mmm, and what’s that?”
“Having you there for every moment of it.”
I feel the bed shake from his light chuckling. “You just want to laugh at how bad I am at arcade games.”
“We also ate at Desert Moon.”
“Mmm … Taqueria Tía Juanitas is better.”
“You’re only saying that out of loyalty to Mars’s mom. Mars was with us, by the way.”
“Traitor,” growls Cooper playfully.
“I just had so much fun today.” I can’t wipe the smile off of my face. “I know you had to do things at the bar. We have our lives apart, and we have our lives together. It’s all a beautiful design.”