Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 81083 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 405(@200wpm)___ 324(@250wpm)___ 270(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81083 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 405(@200wpm)___ 324(@250wpm)___ 270(@300wpm)
“Even when it may be a trigger for you? Might pose a challenge for you?” she asked, tilting her head.
“Some of the best things in life are the things that challenge us,” I answered, noting the way she wet her lips as I inched closer to her.
“Some would say that’s an excuse to misbehave,” she said.
“Would you categorize anything I did today as misbehaving?” I asked, leaning one hand on the railing opposite her. She didn’t shy away from the nearness, instead she shifted toward me, almost instinctually so.
“No,” she answered, looking up at me. “You did amazing considering the circumstances, but I wonder what you would’ve done if that fan had kept it up?” she asked. “What would you have done if he’d continued to shout at me? Or if an ump made a bad call? Or one of your players made a careless mistake?”
Something knotted in my chest that was hard to swallow around.
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “I won’t lie to you. I’m protective of my team. You’ve seen that. Saw it firsthand in the footage all over the media right now. You know the truth behind my reaction, even if it doesn’t excuse it.” I sighed, moving another inch closer to her. “And I’m feeling…protective of you, too. I know I shouldn’t, but I am. So that guy flipping you off…”
“It triggered you.”
“Yes.”
Understanding flashed over her features.
“I appreciate your honesty,” she said, nodding as she reached out and laid her hand over my forearm in a comforting gesture that made my muscles tight with need.
“I think you invented honesty,” I said, and her soft laughter was a reward that made my heart expand in my chest, but just as easily, there was doubt hitting me, crashing over me. “With what you saw today, what I’ve told you, do you think I’m in danger of becoming…worse?” I lived and breathed that fear every damn day. Every time my control slipped.
“No, Ethan,” she said, shaking her head. “You’re not going to get worse. Regardless of what social media is trying to paint you as right now, you’re not that guy. I’m very good at sensing those types of people, and I don’t feel that with you.” She shrugged, meeting my eyes again with a silent encouragement and acceptance radiating from them.
Something warmed inside me, something shifting to make room for the words she gave me.
A gift, really. One she didn’t have to give me. We’d only had a few sessions, she didn’t owe me anything. We could have a hundred sessions and she wouldn’t owe me anything, especially not these kind, accepting words that made me feel seen in a way I hadn’t in so many years.
A charged spark flared between us, tugging on me, begging me to get closer despite her already touching my forearm. I needed more, and from the look in her eyes, she felt it, too. I shifted closer, bringing my arm to the other side of her, caging her in between me and the railing.
“What do you feel?” I asked, my voice coming out rough and raw.
Her full lips parted, a shaking breath escaping them as her eyes darted across my face, almost like she was searching for an answer there.
“What do you feel when you’re with me?” I asked again, desperate to know that I wasn’t the only one feeling this chemistry, feeling this explosive need to be around her in every way I could be.
“I feel…” She visibly swallowed, the corners of her mouth turning up just slightly as she met my eyes. “Safe.”
Relief barreled down my spine at that singular word.
She wasn’t afraid of me, despite the truths I’d laid bare.
“Wanted?” she added on a shaken breath.
Lava streaked through my veins.
“Why did that sound like a question?” I asked. Did she doubt that I wanted her?
“You could’ve asked for anyone else to be assigned to you if you were interested in further exploration of that kiss we had the night before I found out you were my client. You didn’t—”
“I told you,” I said. “I need the best. You’re the best.”
A sigh left her lips. “That’s fair,” she said. “The professional relationship has to take precedence over whatever personal one would’ve developed.”
“Sure,” I said. “That doesn’t mean I don’t want you.”
Her eyes fluttered up to mine.
“It doesn’t mean I don’t think about that kiss every single second of the day, every time those lips of yours curve into that smile that drives me wild.”
“Ethan,” she whispered my name like a plea.
I leaned down a little, lowering my voice between us. “Do you ever think about it?”
A visible tremble shook her body, but the flush creeping along her skin told me it had nothing to do with the cold.
“Yes,” she admitted.
“How often?”
“All the time.”
Fucking hell, her admission had every muscle in my body tightening with need.