Total pages in book: 157
Estimated words: 161899 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 809(@200wpm)___ 648(@250wpm)___ 540(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 161899 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 809(@200wpm)___ 648(@250wpm)___ 540(@300wpm)
“She seemed relaxed?”
I loved not only that he asked, but he sounded like he really wanted the answer.
So I ran it down for him.
“She thought Birch was rude for interrupting our dinner. But she liked it a lot that you were mad at him for doing it. Which translates to she likes that you stood between him and us and how he would have ruined our night if you hadn’t been there. As for other stuff, she’s never lost anyone, not like…not like…”
“I know what you’re saying,” Auggie broke in gently.
I nodded, grateful I didn’t have to say yet again that Juno and me were losing my mother.
“So I’m not sure she’s really processing what’s happening with Mom right now. But she sees it as an opportunity to step away from Dad and Saffron, which, sharing themes with you, I was already considering.”
He raised both brows. “Yeah?”
I nodded and explained, “Your father calling you a ‘bastard of the church’ and saying to your face you’d sully the brothers and sisters you’ve never met kinda puts a pall on familial feelings.”
This “Yeah” from Aug was soft and tender.
I snuggled closer.
“Mostly, she wanted me to leave her and get down here to be with you,” I told him.
“You’ve got a great kid, Pepper,” he said.
“I’m glad you think that way, because she really digs you too.”
He tucked me even tighter, so I dipped my head and rested my cheek against his shoulder.
“Food was fantastic,” he murmured.
“Your cheesesteaks are better.”
“Well, yeah, because steak…and cheese.”
I laughed softly.
“A lot’s going on for you, and you seem good too,” he remarked.
I pressed my forehead into the side of his neck and punctuated that by saying, “Because I am.”
“Baby.”
The depth of those two syllables told me he got what I was saying.
“Thanks for heading off Birch.”
“You wanna shield Juno from everything, but you can’t. I wanna shield you both from everything, but I can’t. That said, when I can, I’m gonna.”
I stared at the blue sweater covering his wide chest and told myself I was not going to cry.
In order to take us somewhere to help me with that, I shared, “You know, Juno is a kid and I’m trying to teach her to take care of her things, and she’s good about that. And she was the one who recently showed interest in helping me take care of our space. So she helps around the house. But she’s still a kid.”
“Wanna explain why you’re telling me something I know?” he asked.
“Because you’re exceptionally tidy.” I lifted my head so I could catch his eyes and assured, “I like it. Because I am too. I like my space uncluttered. Clean. Just…you know, Juno might be in a phase where she’s interested in helping because I keep our surroundings like I do. And then she’ll be out of it. Or whatever. And I’m not one of those moms who rides her kid to—”
“Babe.”
“What?”
“I keep my pad, car, yard, life like I do because when I grew up, it was chaotic. I realized that about myself a long time ago. It gives me something not only to see order around me, but to be the one who keeps it. When I have a kid, or if your kid is in my life, I’m not gonna be a drill sergeant. I’m gonna let ’em be kids. I can clean up after them, until it’s time for them to learn how to do it for themselves. So if you’re worried about that…”
He trailed off, and as he did, it came to me that I actually was kind of worried about that.
Now I wasn’t.
Now I was thinking something else.
“I hate that your life was chaotic, honey,” I said.
“I do too. But it was, and it isn’t anymore. Or at least, it might not be in that way.”
That was when I started to get ticked.
And I shared why.
“You know, it would have been cool if we could have started seeing each other, getting to know one another, bringing Juno into that without all this shit swirling around us.”
“Maybe,” Auggie allowed. “But shit has a way of swirling, Pepper, no matter how hard you try to stop it. I’ll run down what I knew about you before we began…you’re gorgeous, dress great, seemed cool, and you’re a loyal friend. This is what I know now. You’re all of those, all the things I said earlier, and you deal with crisis really well. Do I want us to have crisis after crisis thrown at us? No. Is it fucking attractive as all hell that you don’t completely fall apart at just a hint of shit going south, much less all that’s been thrown at you the last week? Yeah. It really fucking is.”
I’d always been pretty proud of my hair.
Now I was pretty damned proud of that.