Total pages in book: 49
Estimated words: 48187 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 48187 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 241(@200wpm)___ 193(@250wpm)___ 161(@300wpm)
Our lips dance together frantically since her body isn’t able to join in on the party. One day it’ll be ready again, and I’ll be ready too. Until then, kissing is perfectly fine by me. Hell, staring at her as she lives and fucking breathes would be okay too. With Lauren, I’ll take whatever I can get.
She flips the page on her book slowly, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration. I watch her from across the coffee table where I sit in my armchair. The bookshop is quiet on this cold, snowy day. I could stare at the snow falling down outside, or I could stare at her.
I’ll always choose her.
Another page flip.
And another.
I’m glad for the day off to spend it doing nothing with her. Outside of the house. She needs a break from the medicine, her illness, life.
Another page flip.
Absently, she reaches for her bottle of water, but she’s too engrossed in her book to realize she’s nowhere near it. I lean forward, unscrew the lid, and hand it to her. She sips it and then hands it back.
Her hair is messy from having air dried and been pulled into a bun. Dark circles paint her cheeks under her eyes and her skin is pallid. Even her full, pink lips are dry and cracked.
But she’s alive.
Still fucking here.
My fighter.
Lauren Englewood.
It’s then I imagine her as something else. Mine. Lauren Venable. The thought sends my heart galloping in my chest. I try to envision her in a white gown walking down the aisle in front of hundreds of people. But it doesn’t feel right. Instead, I think of the cabin on the lake I sometimes rent from my friend Dane. How even when it’s snowy, the lake is beautiful.
I love Lauren and can’t imagine life without her.
So what am I waiting for?
“I’ll be right back,” I tell her. “You’ll be okay for a little while?”
“Mmmhmm,” she murmurs without looking up.
I chuckle and kiss the top of her head. “Text me if you need me.”
Quickly, I tug on my coat and gloves before heading outside in the blistery cold. Where I’m going, I won’t need a car. I walk a block down to the nearest jewelry store. Once inside, the woman at the counter, who looks to be around my mother’s age, brightens at seeing me.
“Good evening, sir. What can I help you with?”
I give her a sheepish grin. “I’m looking for a ring. For my girl.”
Her eyes glitter with excitement. “What kind of ring?”
“One that says I’ll love you forever, no matter how long that may be.”
“Ahh, a romantic looking to propose?”
“Yeah.”
“What kind of budget are we looking at?” she asks as she walks me over to a glass case.
“I’ll just know it when I see it.”
I peer into the case and peruse all the sparkly diamonds. They all look the same to me. Until I find the one that stands out. A giant yellow diamond surrounded by mandarin garnets and then another circle of rubies. It reminds me of a sunset. So Lauren.
“That one,” I say, pointing at it.
“That one’s the priciest in the bunch,” she warns.
I glance at her name tag. “Can you put a price tag on love, Wanda?”
Her eyes gleam. “Certainly not, Mr. um…”
“Dr. Venable is fine.”
“I’ll wrap this up, Doctor.”
The snow is growing heavier and the wind blows hard, but I’m stunned as I stare at her through the window. Her smile is wide and bright as she talks to a child no older than five or six. The child wears a white plastic helmet and seems bashful, but is also smiling. It’s no different than how she lights up Taylor’s face at the hospital or even Cora’s.
She does this to people.
Lauren may love sunsets, but she’s the sunrise, lifting high above everyone and giving them something to look up to. She warms them with her smiles and reflects back hope.
As I walk back inside, the woman with the child is walking out. I recognize her. Another foster parent like myself. I’d gotten into the gig because of wanting to help Jenna get Cora, but I’ve gotten to know some of the locals around here through the meetings and online forums.
“Anna? How’s it going?”
Anna smiles. “Just picking up a book for Ollie. He just joined us.”
I squat down and retrieve a sucker from my pocket. “I’m Dr. Venable. Want a sucker?”
Ollie looks up at Anna and she nods.
“Ollie is a cool name,” I tell him. “Where’d you get the cool hat?”
His dark eyes brighten. “You like it?”
“Pretty cool if you ask me. I’m a doctor and see them all the time, but this is the coolest one I’ve ever seen,” I assure him.
“Why?” he asks.
“Because it’s sitting on the head of a cool little guy, duh.”
He giggles. “That lady said it looks like a dinosaur egg.”