Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 76821 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 384(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76821 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 384(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
“You know that I’m not like you,” I told Triss as we each grabbed a few things off the shelves.
“Get both of them,” she demanded, yanking down both color t-shirts I’d been considering. “Don’t object. I don’t think you understand how much money these guys have. We are not going to feel guilty over a couple hundred dollars when they are the reason we had to abandon our lives and possessions.
“But anyway, yes, back to you. I do know you. Which means I also know that while you are not a social butterfly, and can often be found attempting to blend into the decor of any room you are in, that you usually at least attempt to be friendly and social. Even if it isn’t your strong suit. It’s not like you to just… stay in your room all the time.”
“You’re right,” I agreed.
No, I wasn’t like Triss. But when she had parties, I did come out. I showed my face. I said hello to people I knew. And, sure, did I maybe focus on things like cleaning up or refilling snacks? Yeah. But I was out there, amongst the people.
I was being kind of rude.
I had to at least show my face for dinner.
Whether I was comfortable with that or not. I could just… cling to Triss. Or even Eddie, who seemed very welcoming and easy to talk to.
That was going to be my plan.
Shopping took… many hours.
Triss hit up every section, seeming to enjoy drawing out the clear torment of the bikers tasked with taking us out.
In fact, it was only Alaric who seemed amused by the whole thing.
“I grew up in a pretty big family,” he told me as Triss led Cato and Levee with her to the feminine hygiene section purely to screw with them, and I headed instead toward the books. “I’m used to people who like to fuck with you for fun.”
“You’re Saskia’s brother, right?” I asked, hoping I wasn’t revealing too much, that he could figure it was information Triss or I had gotten from some of the other guys. Not because I ran a super-secret fan site about all of them.
“Yeah,” he confirmed. “And, yes, I used to be a stripper,” he added, like he was getting ahead of a question he was asked frequently. Even though I would never have asked him that.
“Do you miss it?” I asked, sensing something in the way he spoke of it. It was sort of the way old high school jocks or cheerleaders talked about the ‘good old days’ when they were the golden boys and girls. There was a wistfulness to him.
“Sometimes,” he admitted, nodding, his gaze moving away, like he was trying to hide some emotion he knew would be on his face.
I’d written on the site about how he’d seemed to be losing a lot of weight, getting almost unhealthily cut.
I wondered now if it was because some part of him was still craving that attention that he used to get on stage. The adoration of the women. The jealousy of the men.
Attention could be a drug to people who craved it. It was habit-forming and dangerous, like any other kind of addiction.
And when you suddenly cut off the supply, things could spiral.
Maybe that was what was going on with Alaric.
“Were you drawn to the attention at first or the money?” I asked as I picked up a book.
“I was young and grew up dirt poor. I wanted the money. But it wasn’t long before I started to really like the attention,” he said, giving me a charming smirk that just… did nothing for me.
Likely because I could still hear the sounds Donovan made as he came in my mind.
“So what made you join the club then?” I asked, genuinely curious. It hadn’t been a story I could figure out from any other source. “Just because Saskia and Che ended up together?”
“That was part of it. Family. Sass had been away a lot for years, so it was nice to have her back. And when I spent time at the clubhouse, it was like the craziness of my family when we’d been growing up. But I guess I was also aware that dancing wasn’t exactly a lasting career path. It always had an expiration date. I got out before it was up.”
Or maybe a little too soon?
I didn’t want to say that, though.
“Do you regret it?”
“No,” he said, shaking his head, but I detected maybe a hint of a false note in there. “It’s just different,” he insisted, and that came off as true.
“Where did you learn to shoot so well? Triss said you are, like, a marksman.”
“I dunno, really. I always had a good eye, good aim. Great eyesight. It made me good at sports as a kid. Then good with a gun when I picked one up at a range.”