Total pages in book: 116
Estimated words: 118042 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 590(@200wpm)___ 472(@250wpm)___ 393(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 118042 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 590(@200wpm)___ 472(@250wpm)___ 393(@300wpm)
We’d barricaded ourselves inside that room. We were selfish in our need for privacy. We spent our time reading, eating, or playing cards, both of us pausing every now and again to just stare at each other.
Stare and smile and shake our heads in disbelief that this was real.
We were truly here.
Together.
We had no pain to endure. No games to play. No threats to survive.
It’d taken a long time for us not to jump when the door opened.
We went from tolerating my brother’s company to actually enjoying the dinners when we joined them as a family. The first night I’d been cleared by the doctors and given a walking stick to get around, the dinner had been stilted and awkward. Just the four of us: his wife and my twin flame.
The dynamics took a while to smooth out, especially after a lifetime of having no one. I’d gone from being alone to having a woman who loved me (somehow) and a brother who actually cared.
The only thing that would’ve made those dinners any better would’ve been Peter.
He’d been the first friend I’d ever had, despite our rocky beginning.
He’d taught me how to accept a bond from another man after only having my father’s hate as an example.
Slowly, the dinners turned into all-evening affairs. While Tess and Ily grew to know one another, Q took me to the library to learn how to be siblings.
Turned out, I would’ve definitely died in that villa in Tuscany if he hadn’t gotten there first.
Fifteen men had been waiting for me.
All armed and ready.
Q and his mercenaries had taken them by surprise, mowing them down without blinking. I still didn’t know what he’d done with the bodies, but…I didn’t care.
At least they couldn’t harm anyone else.
And…I’d somehow survived.
Q had cleaned up after me. No one had named me to local police.
I’d gotten away with mass murder and carried those stolen lives with pride.
Ily studied me standing frozen like an idiotic snowman.
Q’s estate slept under a dusting of white. He’d looked at us as if we were mad when we said we were going for a midnight stroll. He didn’t understand that walking in the dark had been our one reprieve in that nightmarish place. A few stolen moments beneath the stars where we could breathe, love, and gather enough strength to survive another day.
“Are you okay?” she whispered, stepping into my arms and looping hers around my waist. Dropping my walking stick, I gathered her close and rested my chin on her fluffy hat. “I’m just…still processing.”
She hugged me tight, snuggling as close as she could. My matching black jacket and jeans—all purchased with my brother’s funds—whispered against her.
“I know what you mean,” she whispered. “I keep pinching myself.”
I laughed under my breath.
The sound made me pause.
A month had passed since I’d gone on a slaughtering spree. Four weeks of living a normal life together, and I still hadn’t gotten used to the joy that now braided with the blackness inside me.
I’d never been so happy.
I still didn’t fully know how to trust it or how to sink into the soft, wonderful feeling, but every day, love warmed me from the inside out. It patched up my holes. It healed the frightened kid I used to be and allowed me to relax for the first time in my life.
The monster within me was sated…for now. My killing binge of traffickers ensured I’d fed the beast enough to be human. I hoped it would always remain sated, but…if one day the desire for bloodshed returned, I still had Q’s list. Still had a few names that could satisfy my creature’s darkness.
Ily pulled away and cupped my cheek with her gloved fingers. Her brilliant eyes glowed just as snowflakes spiralled from the sky. Fractals of white hid the world, placing us in our own snowy paradise.
I couldn’t handle the depth of fucking gratitude.
A month we’d slept side by side and healed.
A month of getting to know my brother, his son, and my sister-in-law.
A month of watching Ily on the phone with her parents. Her brother’s pictures of his rabbit. The messages from Rachel as she grew so close to her due date. Even Ben and Stewart stayed in touch, hinting that they wanted to chat about a business opportunity when we were ready to step back into society.
And not once had I tried to seduce her.
To be honest, I was afraid.
Afraid that I’d want to hurt her. That I’d need her tears or her fear.
I’d made a vow to never lay another finger on her. I intended to keep it.
Pressing her lips together, Ily canted her head and smiled. I want you too.
A soft chuckle fell from me. “What gave it away? The fact that I’m hard even with you dressed up like a marshmallow or that I’m finally strong enough not to limp like an old man.”