Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83195 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 416(@200wpm)___ 333(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83195 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 416(@200wpm)___ 333(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
I trail my thumb down to her lips, and she sucks in her breath. My gaze flicks back to hers. Fucking stunning.
A wild bird inside, soaring. Singing. An inferno and phoenix all in one.
My cock twitches as my gaze dips down to her breasts. This fucking woman has no idea how perfect her body is built, and I can’t stand it when she wears those crop tops. Can’t stand the way men look at her when she passes by.
Mine.
I want—no, need—to at least taste her.
I dip my head to hers, licking her upper lip. She tastes like cherries, and I force my tongue into her mouth. A small moan escapes her, and I press into her. Deeper, harder, and demanding, all the ways my body needs her.
Her hands feather around my neck as she pulls me in. I tense, pushing away the nauseating swirl in my gut, overridden by the need for more of her.
Disgusting. Beautiful. Chilling. Warmth.
Her.
I use her as my anchor as I maneuver her onto my lap and let her straddle me. My cock firmly presses against my pants, screaming to be deep inside her.
Fucking perfect.
She’s starving. Ravishing me, and I’ll give her all that I have to offer.
Her body grinds against me, every touch a warm embrace colliding with the screaming, revolting ugliness that surfaces within me. But I push through it because I want her more. I slide my hand under her dress and over her outer thigh. And, fuck me, if that ass is not my undoing.
I fucking need her like my next breath.
I grab her throat, and her eyelids burst open in surprise as she pulls away slightly.
We share a breath as she goes to lean in, but I pin her where she is, control slithering back in.
Too young. Too good. Too real.
Disgusting. Alone. Blood.
“I’m sorry,” I croak. She’s confused as she awkwardly gets off me.
“I don’t mind the throat grabbing,” she’s quick to say. “You just surprised me is all.”
She’s not the only one who’s surprised.
I wipe at my mouth. What the fuck just happened?
I’ve fucked plenty of women, but none where the voices stopped. This fucking beacon of light of a woman was the only time I’d felt a sense of serenity.
And it’s fucking terrifying.
I know how to fight my demons. I become the demon.
But not Lena. She’s too good for this part of my world.
“I’ll call for Clay to take you home,” I say as I stand.
“Wait? What?” She sits upright.
I step out of the room. Because if I make her mine, I won’t let her go.
I’ll break her into a million pieces, killing that light inside her.
Whereas I might take satisfaction from it elsewhere, I just can’t do it to her.
She screams out my name, but I’m already gone.
CHAPTER 18
Lena
The following week at rehearsals is hectic, the busiest we’ve been since I started here. It’s probably because it’s the holidays, but it’s been good to be busy and then go home and crash—on my bed with my new mattress. I also got new locks installed thanks to Anya.
She’s a very prickly person, but, somehow, I still quite enjoyed her company. Weird.
It’s nice to have something to focus on, and because of our extra show times, I haven’t worked at the bar since the incident in the alley with the drunk guy. I still haven’t decided whether I want to go back.
I haven’t heard or seen Alek since that night we had Thai food at his place. Not that I expected to see him or hoped to. I just kind of thought I would. I still can’t make any sense of that night. He’s hot as fuck. Clearly deranged. Yet I was straddling him like my life fucking depended on it. The man can fucking kiss. And then he snapped shut. Switched off completely and was out the door. I don’t know if it has to do with his dislike of touching people or if it’s just me, but either way, the guy can go fuck himself.
I take a deep breath as I stand just offstage, waiting for my cue to re-enter and sing. Performing pulls me away from all the bullshit and crazy thoughts. When it’s time, I take my place at center stage. The lights dim, and I embrace this part of me. My warmth, my soul, my inner being. The part of me that must be shared with the world that I couldn’t even stop when I was forced to try.
I’m free.
I’m myself.
It flows out of me, this emotion and power of the song I’ve made my own. It’s about a woman who has lost her lover and is bidding him goodbye. It rattles me, consumes me, then comes to a stop.
There’s silence as I look out at the full house, then applause breaks out as people stand from their chairs. I can’t help but smile every time, and I’m relieved that I was able to connect with each and every one of them.