Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 117336 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 469(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 117336 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 469(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Alma looks around the clinic. "I brought my boyfriend in to help out. He got permission to stay here tonight and assist. He's not familiar with nursing, but he can do the basics. And we've got a few helpers, right? So why don't you go home and sleep for a few hours? Get some rest." She touches my shoulder. "I'm sure Lord Azar is looking for you."
I look around the clinic in a daze. She's right. There are three of the militia helping now, two of them new and one the sweet-faced Latin man that's Alma's boyfriend. Everything's covered for now, and at the moment, no one's sleeping on the floor. I take a deep breath…and weariness crashes through me. It's like now that I've had time to think about being tired, I'm exhausted. I contemplate staying here overnight and avoiding Azar for another day, but that seems petty and childish. "Right. Yes. Of course. I'll be back first thing in the morning."
My assistant Alma just nods at me and takes the towel from my hand, moving to swap places with me at my patient's side. I watch her for a moment, numb, and then head to the doors of the clinic. As I step outside, one of the guards smashes a bat down on one of the giant bugs in the street and then kicks the corpse aside. They seem to be everywhere these days, those stupid, horrible bugs. Rubbing my arms, I shudder.
And then I notice something smells delicious. Oh god, I hope that's not bugs. The thought makes me a little queasy. I stagger forward, exhausted, and follow the scents. As I do, I see a folding table set up down the street, and people lined up in front of them. Two militia guards are at the table, ladling soup out to people in whatever they can bring to use as a bowl—old cans, soda bottles, whatever. Another guard stands nearby with his weapon at hand, eyeing the crowd that's gathered. "Two lines," he calls out in a bored voice. "We'll feed everyone. Please form two lines. No pushing."
People step up to the table, have their bowls filled, and are handed a flyer. Someone glances at their flyer and then tosses it aside. I hurry over to grab it, reading the page. It's hand-written in block lettering.
Lord Azar is buying your black-market goods in exchange for food. Contact the militia for more details. Enjoy the soup!
I read it twice, then a third time to make sure I'm not imagining things. Azar's feeding people…like I asked. Not just that, but he's presenting people a way to acquire more food for their families. Hopefully this will go a long way towards stopping people from eating the bugs and building trust. If he can prove to people that they can buy food with their goods…hope bubbles up in my chest. I clutch the flyer like it's a love note, tears stinging my eyes.
He's trying. I know he's trying. It's not instinct for him, to be kind or to do good things. He doesn't consciously think about it. Right and wrong haven't been hammered into him from birth. But…he's trying. I can't ask for more. Emotional, I turn towards the barracks.
"Lady Melina?" One of the guards normally outside of the clinic comes up to my side and gives me a worried look. "Shall I escort you home? It's dark out."
I manage a nod. "Yes, thank you."
Chapter
Twenty-Two
AZAR
I try to read The Witch of Blackbird Pond, but the words blur in front of my eyes. I cannot concentrate, not when it is dark and Melina is not yet home. I want to hunt her down, but I know my efforts would not be appreciated. I miss her and I'm worried about her, and the combination of these two things bothers me. I don't want to care. Caring means that I lose my focus, that her mood affects mine. Caring means that I have a dull ache in my chest when my mate looks at me with distress. She avoided me today, and I should not care. I should not.
But I have been inconsolable at the thought that Melina might hate me. All because I struck a human girl that means nothing. It was a foolish action, and one I did not realize was a bad call. I did not realize that Melina would think that I could raise a hand to her at any time. I would never. Just the thought makes me sick. I wish I knew how to be the male she needs.
Instead, I am a fool of a Salorian who cannot obey the rules of his people, and yet cannot seem to please the human I love.
This is love. I am positive of it. In Bridge to Terabithia, the human boy was filled with aching sorrow at the loss of his beloved friend. I think about Melina, and I ache. I ache and I hurt inside my spirit, because I want her to obsess over me as much as I obsess over her. What will I do if she leaves me? What will I do if she never wants to look at me again?