Total pages in book: 166
Estimated words: 156145 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 781(@200wpm)___ 625(@250wpm)___ 520(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 156145 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 781(@200wpm)___ 625(@250wpm)___ 520(@300wpm)
Knowing that did nothing to prepare him for the fury on her face when he opened the door. “Lucy.”
“No, you do not get to Lucy me as if nothing’s changed.” She pushed into the apartment and spun to face him. “What the hell was that tonight, Gideon?”
He kept his expression stoic, knowing it would make everything worse. “I’m just doing what you contracted me for.”
She actually took a step back. “You’ve got to be kidding me. You’re going to take that stance now? What happened to you wanting me to pick you?”
“I was wrong.” It actually hurt to say the words aloud, and it hurt more to see the naked pain on her face. He forced himself to keep talking. A little hurt now, rather than a big hurt later. “This was fun, but you were right when you pointed out that I’m not the keeping kind.” She’d survived her breakup with Jeff. She’d bounce back even faster from this mistake with him.
Because that was how she’d see it in a few weeks—a mistake, a bullet dodged.
“You’re serious.” Lucy shook her head. “What happened between leaving my bed and writing me a note and...” She trailed off. “What did Roman say to you?”
She always had been smart. He let nothing show on his face. “He didn’t have to say anything. A little distance was all I needed to realize that we aren’t suited.”
“Aren’t suited.” She pressed a hand to her chest as if he’d reached out and hit her there. Gideon felt like he had. She finally took a deep breath and lifted her chin. “You’re a coward, Gideon Novak.”
He flinched. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“You. Are. A. Coward.” He could actually see her putting the pieces of herself back into place, though her bottom lip quivered, just a little. “Last night was too good and, I’ll be honest—it scared me, too. But the difference between you and me is that I fought that fear and focused on how good it could be.” She raked him with her gaze. “I’m not fighting for this. I spent too long fighting to be with someone who didn’t even try. I won’t do that again, Gideon. This was barely a bump in the road and you’ve already jumped ship. Fine. So be it.” Her lower lip quivered again, but she made an obvious effort to still it. “I chose you, and you didn’t choose me.”
It felt like she’d stabbed him and twisted the blade. “Lucy—”
“No. Your actions speak just as clearly as your words and I’m not stupid. I understand.” She drew herself up. “Consider our contract terminated. Keep the fee for all I care, as long as I never see you again.”
Gideon watched her walk out of his apartment—and out of his life. He shut the door softly behind her and walked to his kitchen and stared blankly out the window. It’s done. Something that took so much effort to coax into being, decimated in the course of a single day.
He braced his hands on the edge of the counter, an anchor to keep from chasing her down and trying to explain. There was no explaining this in a way that accomplished the severing of their relationship and left her pissed off enough to leave him behind for good. As much as he’d hated hearing it, Roman was right. Gideon hadn’t been thinking straight from the second Lucy contacted him. If he had been, he would have set her up with someone else for her matchmaking needs. He wasn’t qualified for either of the things she needed from him, and he sure as fuck wasn’t an unbiased party.
Letting his own selfish needs overshadow hers, and then convincing her to see things his way...
Yeah, there was no explaining that away. Cutting Lucy loose was the best thing he could have done for her.
He let his head drop between his shoulders. The best thing for Lucy, but he’d be riding this wave of pain for the foreseeable future. Getting out of town might help, but the memories of what they’d done here and elsewhere would still be waiting to ambush him when he returned.
No, better to stay and push through the worst of it.
A band around his chest formed, blisteringly hot and so tight he exhaled in a rush. He’d just ended things with Lucy.
Ended for good.
Gideon slumped against the counter. He’d known that woman for six damn years. Had been respectful of her relationship with Jeff and never said so much as a word out of line. Had backed the fuck off and left her alone after things had imploded so she wouldn’t have to look at his face and see a constant reminder of the lies she’d fielded.
Through it all, a small part of him had been sure that it would work out. One way or another, he’d find a path to Lucy. That he’d win her if he was just patient enough.