Total pages in book: 61
Estimated words: 57188 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 286(@200wpm)___ 229(@250wpm)___ 191(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 57188 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 286(@200wpm)___ 229(@250wpm)___ 191(@300wpm)
Layla looked so confused. “You want to?”
Brady looked adorable and vulnerable as he nodded his desire to help. “I do.”
“Okay.” Layla took his hand and practically dragged him out of the kitchen. “Good night, Toni!”
I smiled at the cheerfulness in Layla’s voice, happy that she was finally feeling as if this was her home. When I was alone, the smile dropped and I decided to clear my mind by putting away the dishes and leftover food. The past week without Brady felt strange, which only highlighted how important it was to put some much needed distance between us.
We’d been sleeping together for just a few weeks, but sharing a bed every night and having most meals together made everything feel more intense in a shorter period of time. It was an accelerated non-relationship, and now that it was over, I felt heartbroken.
I missed him.
But like most emotions, I knew it would pass. Whatever I felt for Brady was genuine, but not sustainable because he refused to let it be anything close to that. So I would shove those feelings down deep until they faded to the point of nothingness. In the meantime I would maintain a healthy, professional distance between us.
And I would let whiskey be my assistant. Whiskey and moonlight on the terrace would be my salvation until I no longer needed it.
“Hey.” His deep voice startled me out of my reverie.
“Hey,” I shot back, my gaze focused on the stars that twinkled in the sky above.
“What are you up to?”
I bit back a smile at his attempt at small talk. “Star gazing.” It was awkward as hell and I hated it, but this was how it had to be.
“Toni,” he began and I braced for what I knew was coming. “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you weren’t important.” He sighed and raked a hand through his hair as he dropped down on the lounger beside me.
I shook my head, finally letting my gaze settle on his beautiful face. “I don’t need an apology, Brady. I never did.”
“Then what do you need?”
“Nothing.” I hated that he seemed hurt and confused by things, but he created this problem. “I wanted what happened between us as much as you did, and I’m not blaming you for that.”
His brows knitted together. “But you are blaming me for something?”
“No,” I sighed and took a long sip of whiskey. “I just think it’s best for both of us if we go back to being nanny and employer.”
He growled his frustration. “Why do you want to know me so badly?”
“I work for you, Brady. I can get “just sex” anywhere. And literally anywhere else will be less complicated than this,” I motioned between us. “This will get messy going the way that it is. Hell, it’s already messy and that probably means I’ll end up looking for a new placement sooner rather than later.”
“I already told you that I won’t fire you.” He was breathing heavily, his frustration breaking through the confusion.
“You say that now but what if we continue sleeping together? What if I develop feelings for you and I want even more than a few details about your life? What will you do?” He looked so confused I almost felt bad for him. Almost. “The horror on your face says it all, Brady.”
“It’s not horror, I’m just not sure where this is coming from.”
I stared at him for a long time and smiled. “You really don’t get it, do you?”
“No,” he growled. “I don’t.”
A sad smile crossed my face. “You act like a woman hasn’t ever just wanted to know you before.” Which had to be bullshit because Brady was handsome and funny and smart.
He laughed bitterly. “It’s not an act.”
My heart broke for him, but I couldn’t let him break my heart out of sympathy. “Then it’s too bad for both of us, because that’s all I wanted from you. Well that and your hot body.” And maybe your heart. But that was definitely not on the table, and his behavior now helped me come to terms with that fact. Sure, it hurt like hell, but now that I understood, his actions at least made some sense.
“Toni,” he groaned when I stood and walked away.
“It’s all right, Brady. I get it now. We’ll go back to the way things were before we kissed and everything will be fine.” I hoped anyway, but Brady’s next words stopped me dead in my tracks.
“And if I don’t want that?”
I sighed and turned back to face him. “Well then you have the power to change it, in a variety of ways.”
He grabbed my wrist and pulled me back to him, a look of absolute anguish in his eyes. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you, Toni. I missed you.”
I smiled. “I missed you too, Brady.”