Total pages in book: 230
Estimated words: 217798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1089(@200wpm)___ 871(@250wpm)___ 726(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 217798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1089(@200wpm)___ 871(@250wpm)___ 726(@300wpm)
I wasn’t remotely essential.
I lifted my chin. “I can assure you that I, like every other Order member, has been born and raised within the organization. In reality, I’m more knowledgeable about anything that has to do with the Order than Miles.” I wasn’t being a braggy-mc-bragster either. That was the damn truth. That was my job at the Order. The researcher. The reader. The studier. I was the Willow in an army of Buffys and Angels. “I can assist you with whatever it is that you need to speak with us about.”
“I’m sorry,” Tanner was quick to reply. “I didn’t mean to insinuate that you couldn’t handle this. It’s just that….”
“What?” I lifted my brows, waiting.
“You’re uncomfortable around us,” Faye stated plainly. “Which I can completely understand with what happened to you—”
“What happened to me is irrelevant.”
Faye’s gaze softened just a little. “I can smell your anxiety. It reminds me of woodsmoke.”
Now my face was on fire. Was it truly that obvious that I was anxious? “You can smell my anxiety?”
Faye nodded.
Well, that was something I never knew and that was somewhat creepy.
“And you’re gripping the chair like it’s some kind of lifeline,” Faye pointed out. “It’s like you’ve already forgotten that two years ago, we fought beside the Order and pushed the Queen back into the Otherworld.”
Tanner tensed at the mention of the Queen. Couldn’t blame him. I’d never seen the Queen, but from what I heard, she was a whole bucketful of nightmares.
“That we lost many good fae that night,” Faye continued. “And it seems you’ve also forgotten that the biggest betrayal did not come from us, but came from within the Order.”
“I haven’t forgotten.” How in the world could I? Betrayal had come from the top of the Order, starting with David Faustin. He was the head of the New Orleans Sect, keyword being was, and his betrayal had spread throughout the Order like a virus, infecting nearly everyone. Those within the Order who hadn’t died at the hands of the not-so-friendly fae, the Winter fae, had done so at the hands of those they’d trusted.
I exhaled roughly as I eased my grip off the arm of the chair. “I….” I started to apologize but stopped and decided to be as bluntly honest as Faye. “I was raised to hunt fae and taught that there was no such thing as a good fae. And yes, there were some members of the Order who knew of your existence, but the majority of us didn’t know that the Summer Court had escaped into our world after the war with the Winter Court, and were just trying to live their best lives as human. If anyone had suggested two years ago that there were good fae out there, fae who weren’t feeding on humans, I would’ve laughed straight in their face.”
Faye’s jaw hardened, but I wasn’t done. “And you know damn well the Winter fae, those still loyal to the Queen, far outnumber you all. Two years, Faye. That’s all I’ve had, all many of us had to come to terms with the idea that not all fae are evil incarnate. So, yes, the fae make me uncomfortable. Just as I’m sure we make you uncomfortable.”
“Of course some of you make us uncomfortable, considering there are still some Order members who want to kill us,” Faye shot back.
“I think what Faye is trying to say this whole time, is that we have a fairly serious issue, and we’re worried that your… uncomfortableness may get in the way of helping us resolve this issue.” Tanner folded his hands on the desk. “That is all.”
Okay. Wow. This was getting awkward. “May I be painfully honest?”
“Of course.” Tanner sat back.
“Besides Ivy and Ren, there is not a single member of the Order who isn’t uncomfortable around the fae or may be somewhat prejudiced by all their years fighting fae who want nothing more than to enslave mankind and destroy them. Even Ren isn’t exactly going to be rolling out the red carpet, and his wife is half-fae,” I said, holding their stares. “So, if you’re worried that my uncomfortableness is going to be an issue, then you are going to have the same problem with any Order member besides Ivy. Either you tell me why you wanted a meeting with the Order or you wait until Ivy gets back. Your call.”
“It’s not just that we make you nervous.” Faye tapped the file on her denim-covered thigh. “It’s also that we scare you.”
My head snapped in her direction. “You do not scare me.”
“Is that so?” she murmured.
“That’s so. And just to clarify, the anxiety you’re sniffing isn’t because of you two. I’m just an anxious person ninety percent of the time. You guys make me uncomfortable, but you do not make me anxious or scared. There’s a Mississippi River’s worth of difference between the two.”