Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83236 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 416(@200wpm)___ 333(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83236 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 416(@200wpm)___ 333(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
God, I love him.
Chapter 34
Skylar
I look out the window of Gabby’s childhood bedroom. I’ve been here several times. It’s close to the Devil’s Blaze compound, but separate. There’s a private lake with a dock, three beautiful homes, and a small cemetery up on the hill overlooking the property. I know Beth and Katie’s father is buried there. I don’t know the family history, but then again, it’s not my place to know it. They’re having the funeral here today, with an outdoor dinner—most of which is being fixed in a large farmhouse across from Skull and Beth’s home.
It's beautiful, but I hate being here. I hate the reason, but I also hate that I insisted on keeping my relationship with Torin a secret. I made a mistake. The last three nights I’ve had to sneak into his room at the club. I’m pretty sure everyone knows what we’re doing, but I ignore it. Torin would have shown up on my parent’s doorstep if I didn’t show. Plus, I don’t think I could have survived the night without him. He’s held me while I cried every night. We haven’t even had sex. He’s just been taking care of me. Last night, I was such a mess that he ran the bathtub full of water, got in with me and washed my hair, my body, and just held me as the tears fell. In three days, it feels like we’ve been together forever. Not being in his arms today is nearly killing me. I’m not sure how I’m going to survive the funeral without him.
I turn as Gabby murmurs, “Sorry about that.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I respond softly, walking to the vanity she just sat down in. I’m braiding her hair for the funeral. We started a minute ago, but she needed to use the restroom before I finished. I take her soft, blonde hair back in my fingers and start to work.
“You didn’t have to do this, you know. I can handle pigtails, but French braiding is beyond my capability. Mom used to always do it, but …”
I squeeze her shoulder. “I like doing it,” I answer honestly. Gabby is in so much pain today. Deep inside, I’m terrified that we won’t find Mattie and I’ll be just like her soon. It terrifies me. “How are you holding up, Gabby?”
She lets out a sad sigh. “I could ask you the same thing.”
“You could,” I answer, “but I asked first.”
“Skylar, I know what everyone thinks of me. Heck, I think the same thing about myself. Why are you being nice to me?”
“Gabby—”
“I mean it. I know you are aware of what I tried to do to Dom and how that hurt Thea. Everyone hates me, and I deserve it. You don’t have to pretend.”
I exhale as I finish her hair, feeling uneasy. I force myself to look at her eyes in the mirror we’re facing. “Gabby, what you did was wrong. You don’t need me to tell you that.”
“Then—”
“But,” I interrupt before she can argue, “I also know how much you’ve always loved Dom. I’m also not like everyone else. I know how insecure Dom always made you feel. He should have broken up with you years ago, instead of making you feel you weren’t good enough. You got desperate. It’s a feeling I’ve become very familiar with over the last three years. I understand things happen. As long as you leave my sister and her family alone from here on out, I don’t see why we can’t be friends. I think we both could use a true friend. Especially right now. Don’t you?”
“Okay, but you’re kind of letting me off easy. Being desperate doesn’t give you a license to destroy lives.”
“Well, you didn’t destroy Thea’s and Dom’s lives, did you? Now, you all three have a chance to live happily, so why would you think you ruined lives?”
“It was my fault that I was at the clinic that day. My fault I was kidnapped, and that is the very reason both of us lost a brother. They were there to rescue me.”
“How do you figure that? My brother would have been there anyway because Nicole was taken too.”
She frowns, but finally nods. “Okay, but my brother wouldn’t have been. I’m the reason my brother died. My selfishness ended his life.”
Tears fall silently down her cheeks. She looks so broken that my heart hurts for her. I kneel beside her and turn so that I’m looking directly at her, instead of through a mirror. “Gabby, how can you even think that? The Devil’s Blaze and our club are allies. Hell, they’re family. If you don’t think your dad and club wouldn’t have people there to help us, you’re crazy.”
“Maybe some of the club, but not all.”
I grimace but stick to my guns. “Fair enough, but Diego was training hard because he wanted to take over for your dad one day. He would have absolutely been there. You know that. Why are you trying to put so much on your shoulders? Where is all this guilt coming from?”