Total pages in book: 104
Estimated words: 95676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 478(@200wpm)___ 383(@250wpm)___ 319(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95676 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 478(@200wpm)___ 383(@250wpm)___ 319(@300wpm)
How am I supposed to let him go?
"Cam," I choke out, another tear rolling down my cheek.
He thumbs it away, a tender expression on his face. His eyes hold so much emotion I can't read them all. Love, confusion, and pain mingle with desire and sadness, taking my breath away.
"You can't be here," I whisper, shaking my head.
"Why not?"
"You just…you can't. I can't."
"Why not? Talk to me," he pleads. "Please."
He deserves an explanation, but there isn't one I can give him that will make this hurt any less. Nothing I say will satisfy him or make him leave. I know him. He doesn't give up, especially when it comes to me. He risked his entire career just to be with me. If I tell him I lied to save him, he'll fight me every step of the way. Because he's stubborn and brilliant and no one tells him what to do.
So I don't tell him that.
Instead, I do the only thing I can do. I stick to the story I gave Ventura.
"I lied to you," I say. My voice threatens to break, but I press on, bravely forging ahead before anyone sees us together and any chance he has of salvaging his career goes down the drain. "I was seeing Rory."
He shakes his head, his lips tilting into a deep frown. He doesn't believe me.
"I met him at a show in Los Angeles. Detective Ventura has photos from that night."
"What are you talking about?" he asks, his gaze scanning across my face.
"I'm not who you think I am."
"Bullshit." He reaches out like he's going to pull me into his arms.
I take a step back, fighting not to flinch when pain flashes through his expression again.
I want to fling myself into his arms and soothe the hurt I'm causing him, but I can't. Even though he's going to hate me for what I'm about to do to both of us, I don't have a choice. It's the only thing I can do for him that comes anywhere close to making up for everything he's done for me. It kills me that I can't even tell him that.
"I was using you, Detective," I lie, steeling myself against the look in his eyes. He doesn't want to believe me, but he will. He doesn't have a choice, either. "I knew if I could make you believe I was innocent I had a chance of getting away with what I did to him."
"Why are you doing this?"
Because I love you. Because I won't let Fake Ivy ruin your life, too.
I take a deep breath, praying for the strength to see this through and for forgiveness once it's done, and then I say the words that will destroy us both. "You deserve to know the truth, Detective. I don't have f-feeling for you. I-I never did. I lied about that, too."
"Ivy―" Erin says, her voice full of unease and nervousness.
I can't look at her though. The pain in Cam's gaze holds me captive. The emotion is so intense it rips through me, decimating what's left of my heart. All I can think about is him. He's all I've been able to think about since the very first time he touched me. Every part of me wants him to tell me that he doesn't believe me. That he isn't going to let me do this. That he's not letting me walk away from him. Even though I know he can't, I want him to fight me on this.
But he doesn't say a word as he stares at me. The pain in his eyes changes to anger and finally to defeat before a shudder goes through him. His gray eyes flutter.
He doesn't fight me.
He doesn't call bullshit or yell at me or boss me into telling him the truth.
He doesn't say a word. Not a single sound passes his lips before he bows his head.
"Take care, kitten," he whispers then, his voice thick with emotion.
I love you. I'm so sorry.
With one final look in my direction, he turns and walks away from me, taking my heart with him.
Chapter Nineteen
Cameron
"I wondered when you would show up," Duke says, holding open his front door for me with a sigh. "Didn't think it'd take you this fucking long."
"I want to see the photo."
"Which photo would that be?"
"You know which one," I growl, stomping past him into his living room. Like me, Duke is single, doing courtesy officer work at an upscale community. His apartment has a great view of the Bay. Not that I give a shit about that right now. All I care about is Ivy. She was released from jail two hours ago. Listening to her trying to end things with me ripped my fucking heart out of my chest. It's not over between us, not by a long shot.