Total pages in book: 155
Estimated words: 147128 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 736(@200wpm)___ 589(@250wpm)___ 490(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 147128 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 736(@200wpm)___ 589(@250wpm)___ 490(@300wpm)
I felt eyes on me, but instead of looking at the stranger who had heard and would probably tell it to the entire office, I swallowed again. This time it wasn’t that easy, but I managed. If my voice was quieter than before when I answered my dad, I couldn’t help that. ‘It’s going great,’ I answered, even though I wasn’t dieting. He’d been asking me that same question ever since I was a teenager. For some reason my weight had always been a big issue for him and even though I knew it was my natural body shape, his words always affected me. More so when I was younger, but still I was dealing with the lingering effects of his questions.
‘Are you sure?’ my dad asked, completely unaware of my internal struggle with his words. ‘Charlie, I know you’re sensitive about these things, but I think you need to be a little more careful about what you eat if you want to lose weight.’ Taking a half-step back, he gave me a thorough look as I tried not to squirm under his scrutiny. With my right hand I grasped the elbow of my left arm. My fingers slightly biting into my flesh over my shirt, my shoulders slumped forward. After shaking his head in disappointment, he leaned forward and gave my cheek a kiss as my whole body tightened. ‘Your skirt is already too tight. I’m just thinking about your health, that’s all. Don’t get mad at me,’ he whispered.
My eyes watering, I tilted my head up just a little and chose not to say anything, since this was a conversation we regularly had and no matter what I said, he neither heard nor understood. Another shake of his head and then he sighed and moved on. I stood there for a few more seconds, then headed straight towards the bathroom so I could pull myself together. There was one thing I was not going to do at the firm and that was cry.
I made eye contact with Kimberly, who was standing in the doorway of her office, only for a short moment, then quickly looked away.
Did I need to lose weight? I wouldn’t look awful if I lost ten pounds. Did I not like myself the way I was? I very much did. I liked my butt, I liked my curves, my waist, my boobs. I also loved food. But because it was my dad who was commenting and criticizing how I looked when he was supposed to be the one person who was supposed to love me just the way I was, it hurt more. It could be because I hadn’t grown up with a mom who could teach me to love my body and myself no matter what at an early age, but instead had my dad make me feel ashamed of myself on and off throughout my entire life. Even though I was smart enough to know I shouldn’t have let what others thought get to me, what he thought still mattered.
After I took a minute in the bathroom to shake off his comments, I headed back to my room and saw a note on my desk.
Would you like to have a quick and friendly lunch meeting with me at the park while we work on the statement? I’ll order you something with cheese.
Reading the last line made me laugh, and I looked up from my note to see if I could spot him, but he wasn’t in his room. Oddly happy about a lunch meeting with William – friendly or not – I was smiling embarrassingly as I gathered up my things to leave, my dad’s comments already forgotten. I grabbed the note and put it in one of my drawers for safe keeping and then straightened, only to find William waiting for me by my office door.
My smile got even bigger and I felt my body just light up.
‘Hi.’
‘What do you say, Charlie?’ he asked.
‘One thing you should probably know about me if we’re friends now: you can get me to say yes to a lot of things with food.’ I paused. ‘Wait, when I say a lot of things, I didn’t mean it to sound like I meant…’
William just chuckled, cutting me off. ‘Don’t worry, Charlie. I won’t use that confession against you.’
It was probably the best lunch meeting I’d had in a very, very long time – if not the best. It was both fun and strangely professional. It was, I think, one of the first moments when I realized how much I enjoyed working with William and wouldn’t mind actually being his friend.
* * *
When the clock hit 9.30 p.m. our entire team was all dead on its feet, but we had done everything we could’ve for the day and it was time to finally leave the office. Everyone else in the firm had already left by that point and our team was the last to finish things up. Considering we thought we’d have to stay in until 10.30, we counted ourselves lucky.