Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 81867 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 409(@200wpm)___ 327(@250wpm)___ 273(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81867 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 409(@200wpm)___ 327(@250wpm)___ 273(@300wpm)
I can’t stand the censure in his eyes and it makes me throw back the second shot of whiskey. It doesn’t burn as bad this time. “Don’t judge, Callum. You’ve never stood in my shoes.”
He flushes with guilt and immediately apologizes. “I’m sorry. I had no right to say anything. Was he… was your entire life with him like that?”
I wave my hand, ignoring the food, and head back to the mini bar. I pull out another bottle of Jack but before I can open it, Callum takes it from my hand, along with my glass. Rather than deny me the fortification, I watch spellbound as he makes me a mixed drink, adding a generous amount of ice and Coke to the tumbler.
Giving it back to me, he says, “Sip. I don’t want you puking later.”
“Thanks,” I mutter, taking a delicate drink. I’m grateful for his foresight. My head is already swimming.
Callum pulls the chair out from the desk and says, “Sit. Eat.”
We dive into the containers with our chopsticks and it’s a blast of memories. We used to eat Chinese a lot when we were at the University of Denver. It was cheap and easy and we both loved it. We’d eat on the bed, watching TV, and when we were done, Callum would undress me and—
I force my thoughts from that image. That’s not us anymore.
“I told my mom you left Joshua,” Callum says, and my chopsticks stop poised before my mouth. “This was after she told me what happened on the patio.”
I drop a piece of sauce-covered pork back into the container. “She told you what happened?”
“Sort of.” Callum recounts their conversation in which Lila admitted she and Preston were arguing as they stepped out of the back door onto the patio. Seems she didn’t admit he hit her but called it an accident. “And when I told her you left Joshua, she got a little scared on your behalf. She said he’s dangerous.”
The whiskey in my belly sours and the little food I’ve swallowed threatens to come up. “He doesn’t have any limits so yeah, that makes him dangerous.”
“I’m absolutely afraid of the answer, but I’m going to ask it because I need to know… What are we dealing with? Cold, hard truth time.”
I push the food away and pick up the tumbler, taking a hefty sip of my drink. Despite feeling a bit nauseated, I need the liquor to tell this story only once. After that, I don’t want to think about it again.
“When you and I broke up,” I begin, my fingers circling the top of my glass, “Joshua ended up becoming a good friend. I’m not quite sure how it happened, but he just always seemed to be there. He checked in on me, helped me fix a flat tire, invited me to join him and his then-girlfriend on summer outings. It was all very low-key but he was so nice. He was respectful of my broken heart.”
Callum flinches but I don’t pause to tell him it’s okay. It’s not. He hurt me a lot. Not in the same way Joshua has, but it was no less painful.
“I didn’t date for a long time but slowly, Joshua became one of my closest friends. Certainly the only male friend I had. He was in my inner circle.”
Shaking his head, Callum ponders, “But how? He’s always been such a shit.”
I lift a shoulder. “In hindsight, I think he was grooming me. I think he was playing a long game.”
Expression thunderous, Callum slams his chopsticks down into a container, pushing it away. “And then you two started dating?”
Another lift of my shoulder. “It was two years after we broke up, Callum. He’d broken up with his girlfriend and a few months later, he asked me out. It just… progressed from there.”
“And he was there when your parents’ accident happened.” He utters the words as if they taste like ashes.
I don’t bother to validate that statement because I hate to think about how much I relied on Joshua in my grief. I had already believed myself in love with him. He made it easy over those years to forget about Callum.
And when Callum showed up for my mother’s funeral, I hardly had a twinge of feeling left for him.
I mean… there was a twinge, but I pushed it down deep inside.
“Accepting his proposal not long after was an easy choice,” I say, picking up my chopsticks and poking around in the container. I’m no longer hungry but I like keeping my hands busy. “He was going to take care of my dad. He treated me like a queen. Why would I say no?”
“Did you love him?”
“At that time, yes.”
“Was it the same way you loved me?”
“No,” I reply, but I don’t elaborate. He doesn’t ask me to.
“What changed?” Callum asks.