Total pages in book: 123
Estimated words: 119597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 399(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 119597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 478(@250wpm)___ 399(@300wpm)
But it’s not the cold that chills me.
I’m alone.
Panicked and disoriented, I’m transported to another cabin and a different morning, waking without Wolf and finding him on the cliff.
“Kody!” I shoot upward, heaving, wildly scanning the single-room cabin.
Fear sends my heart into a gallop, then pushes it faster when I spot him.
A sharp outline cut against the wooden walls, huddled in a corner, facing away, clad only in underwear, and rocking back and forth.
A protective alarm shrieks through me.
In the low light, I tiptoe forward, straining my eyes to examine his nude back, the muscles rippling beneath a map of old, chaotic trauma. Overlapping wounds, too numerous to count, render years of suffering and human malice. The patterns are random, vicious, the work of various implements of torture.
The work of Denver.
“Kody?”
He doesn’t react, his body rocked by tremors and whatever memory he’s lost in.
My stomach churns as I approach, my legs sore and unsteady.
A sheen of sweat covers his skin. His shoulders hike around his ears, his chin to his chest, his entire frame tensed in a posture of defense. He looks so small, so vulnerable, like a child who’s known nothing but pain.
Such a stark contrast to the strong, feral Alaskan man I’ve come to know and love.
It brings tears to my eyes, but my medical training kicks in, overriding my emotions.
Does he have PTSD? Was it a nightmare? Did my breakdown last night trigger this?
Drawing closer, I assess his physical state, checking for any sign of self-harm, any indication of a nightmare so severe it may have resulted in bodily injury.
He appears unharmed…on the surface.
Slowly, I lower myself to the floor beside him. “Kody?”
He lifts his head, eyes wide, haunted, staring right through me.
As if staring at a ghost.
“Are you okay?” I reach out tentatively, my hand hovering over his shoulder, unsure. “Kody? What happened?”
No response. No indication that he even hears me.
“You can tell me.” I lace my fingers together on my lap to keep from touching him. “Or we can sit in silence until you feel better. Whatever you need.”
He blinks slowly, his gaze gradually clearing, focusing on me.
“Nightmare.” A hoarse whisper. “I was back there…in that cage with Denver. He never stopped…”
“He’s dead,” I say too forcibly and try to gentle my tone. “He can’t hurt you anymore. You’re safe here, with me.”
“Safe?” His expression twists into sudden, violent rage. “I’m weak!”
His bellow sends me careening backward. Not out of fear. He would never hurt me. But my shock at his outburst knocks me off balance.
“Kody, you’re not—”
“I just stood there while you fought him, shot him, beat him with your bare hands. I. Did. Nothing.”
“You were restrained—”
“On my own order, my own fucking stupidity! I put you in that situation. A situation that endangered your life and forced you to kill him. It should’ve been me, Frankie. It should’ve been me protecting you!”
“You went to him because you were protecting me. You protect me every fucking day. You’re not alone in this. We protect each other. Leo, too. It’s what we do.”
“I wanted to be your savior.” He pulls at his hair and resumes rocking. “It should’ve been me.”
He’s breaking my heart.
I don’t know what to do. I can treat physical wounds, but healing the scars of such deep emotional trauma is uncharted territory for me.
All I can do is give him my unwavering support and a safe space to confront his demons.
“The nightmare felt so real.” He covers his face with both hands, scrubbing, breathing heavily. “Except you didn’t show up, and he kept going. He hurt me over and over, and I couldn’t stop him because I wasn’t a grown man. I was just a boy. A weak, helpless little boy.”
Tears well in my eyes, every part of me aching for the child who endured so much alone.
“I’m here.” I brush my fingers along his stiff jaw. “You’re no longer small or helpless. That boy overcame unspeakable horror, fought the worst monster imaginable, and grew into a strong, dependable, compassionate man. You are my savior, Kodiak.”
“But you slew the monster.”
“We both did. You were the brave one who went in there alone with a plan. All I did was follow and react, recklessly and emotionally, like I always do.”
He turns to me, the transformation immediate and startling. His dark features take on a stoniness, a determination that forges him anew right before my eyes.
“It will never happen again.” His gravelly growl vibrates the air between us. “I’ll fight for you, protect you. I’ll be your shield, your blade, your goddamn army.”
“And my stalker.”
“That, too.”
“Okay. Now that we have that sorted, what do you need? Food?” I twist, scanning the dark, barren space. “How about some frozen pemmican? Or a sponge bath? Maybe a nap?”
“You. I only need you.” He grabs my neck and hauls me against him, stealing my breath with his mouth.