Total pages in book: 47
Estimated words: 43681 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 218(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 43681 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 218(@200wpm)___ 175(@250wpm)___ 146(@300wpm)
I glance at my mother, noticing her trembling hands as she plays with strands of her wet hair. Mom turns to face me, her eyes filled with emotion as she wipes the salty tracks from her cheek. “I think it’s time.” Her eyes look a little clearer than the last time I saw her. “Well, Cash here has made me realize…” She chokes up, trying to rein the emotions bubbling out of her. “You’re so lucky to have found each other…and I’m so lucky to have you for a son.”
Mom flings herself at me, crushing me in an embrace. This is the hug I’ve missed all these years. One of a mother and her child. One filled with unconditional love and pure devotion.
Her eyes meet mine and hang there. “She reminds me of myself when I was young, but she’s so much smarter than I ever was. Her gifts are spectacular, and it’s not just singing and songwriting. She’s made me see what I’ve been missing. I’m sorry, Gunner. I’m so damn sorry.”
In my entire life, I never thought I’d see the day Loretta Shaw expressed sweet words of regret and love to me. Sure, I’d hoped for it, but I never imagined my childish dreams would come to fruition.
“I was at a bar two hours away. I don’t know how I got there or who drove me because my car wasn’t anywhere on site. There I was, sitting by a sewer with my vomit decorating my shirt, and I had no one to call for help. Even the only person who’d never abandoned me hated me, and it was my fault.
“I’ve never hated you, Mom. All I’ve ever wanted is for you to get the help you need.”
“I’m going to get help so I can finally be a better mother to you. I know it’s late since you’re grown and all, but if you’ll let me, I’ll try to make it up to you, Gunner.” She pats my shoulder, her voice resolute. “Do you still have the phone number for that treatment facility in Nashville?”
I swallow the lump lodged in my throat. “Yeah, I got it.” I crush her into a hug. No more words left to say. I’ve been begging and praying for this day year after year. “We can get you packed up and on the road by noon, Mama, but… why now? Why today, after everything?”
Her weary eyes soften, and a broad smile turns up her lips. “When I was talkin’ to your sweet songbird, I saw my future grandchildren in her eyes. I knew I had to be there to shower them with hugs and kisses and love. To mend all the damage I’ve done to you, my sweet boy.”
“You know what, Mama?” I encircled her in a hug and pulled my sparrow in under my other arm. “I’ve been thinking about those babies, too.”
Mom’s eyes twinkled with mischief.
“Wait a minute, Gunner Shaw. When were you going to tell me about all these babies?” Laughter laces Cash’s words.
My heart fucking sings. “Welcome to your future, Sparrow. Classic muscle cars, Gibson and Fender guitars, and a shit ton of babies. But we can talk about that once Mom is out of rehab.” I turn to my mother. “Do you need me to pack you up?”
“Shouldn’t you call to see if they have a spot for me first?” Mom asks.
“I’ve been paying for a spot for ten years, hoping you’d agree to go. They have a spot and a private room.”
Mom nods. “My suitcase is in your car. I’m ready. Make the call.”
Chapter 20
Cash
The drive isn’t long, and we’re in front of the rehab center three hours later. I feel a sense of relief. This is a step to getting Loretta sober and giving Gunner his mother back.
“You take care of my Gunner now, you hear?” Loretta says as she encases me in a fierce hug.
“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure he doesn’t get into trouble,” I reply, hugging her back.
Loretta isn’t a bad person. She lost her way. Between the drinking and the depression, she went down a hard road. Now, she wants to live her life instead of letting it pass her by. I’m happy for her and for Gunner. She’s finally ready to get the drinking under control so she can heal the wounds she’s suffered from for years.
Stepping back, I watch Gunner hug his mother, witnessing their unwavering and unconditional love. It’s bittersweet watching them together. I’m beyond happy for Gunner. Loretta taking this massive step shows her desire to finally make it right. Unlike my mother, Loretta has a sickness that keeps her from being a wonderful mother to Gunner. Mine was just greedy. Even with my mom’s attitude, I couldn’t leave her to her vises when she got sick. There was still an invisible pull that ensured I was there for her in the end.