Total pages in book: 129
Estimated words: 121233 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 606(@200wpm)___ 485(@250wpm)___ 404(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 121233 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 606(@200wpm)___ 485(@250wpm)___ 404(@300wpm)
I stood there in his absence, feeling the cool wind of him brushing past me. When I turned, he was facing the kitchen, his back to me, hands clasped on top of his head as his back muscles flexed with every haggard breath.
“Clay,” I tried, fear prickling my nerves.
He stood there silent for so long, I almost said his name again. But then finally, his hands fell to his side, and he pulled his shoulders back, holding his chin high as he turned to face me once more.
“It’s over, G.”
I frowned, confusion sparring with the anxiety niggling at my belly. “What’s over?”
His throat constricted. “Us.”
I laughed. It was automatic, even as I frowned and shook my head and felt tears burning behind my eyes. “What? Don’t be ridiculous. What are you talking about?”
When he didn’t answer, all laughter ceased.
“Clay, what are you saying right now? What are you… What…”
Everything I tried to ask was cut off by the absolute refusal of me to accept what he was saying. I shook my head, over and over, crossing my arms over myself as I stared at him and took in all the pain he was clearly feeling.
“It was all a game to me,” he said, his voice stoic and unmoved, eyes glossed over. “I’m sorry I used you, that I pretended like I wanted to be with you. I had to do what it took to get Maliyah back.”
A single tear fell over my cheek, so fast I couldn’t catch it with the swipe of my hand that came too late. “Get Maliyah back?” I echoed.
“She came over last night,” he said, and the coldness in his voice made me shiver like a tree in a storm. “We talked, and she wants to be together again. It’s what I want, too. I’m just sorry I pulled you into this.”
My face warped with betrayal and emotion, stomach turning so violently I doubled over a bit with the pain. But then I stood again, staring at him through my blurred vision.
And again, his façade slipped.
His bottom lip trembled so bad he wiped his hand over his face to cover it, and then he hung his hands on his hips and turned away from me again to hide the rest.
I narrowed my eyes in suspicion.
And then I charged.
“Bullshit,” I seethed, shoving him from behind. He stumbled forward before turning to face me just in time for me to push him again. “This is all bullshit and I know it. Why are you doing this? What the fuck is going on, Clay?”
“I just told you what’s going on. This has been my plan all along,” he said, voice louder, and I watched as he willed himself with all his might to be angry, to glare down at me — but he failed pathetically, and tears filled his eyes, falling over his cheeks as my heart broke with the sight.
I reached out for him, swiping the wetness from his face before I held his cheeks in my hands.
“Don’t do this,” I begged. “I don’t know what’s going on, but please, don’t do this.”
His face twisted in grief, and he turned away from me but leaned into my palm, closing his eyes and releasing another wave of tears before he peeled my hands off him.
“I have to go,” he whispered, brushing past me.
But before he could reach the door, I ripped him back.
“Stop!” I screamed. “Stop this right now. Look at me,” I begged, grabbing his chin in my hands and forcing him. “Look at yourself. You don’t mean this. You don’t mean any of it.” I shook my head. “You don’t.”
“Please,” he pleaded, and as more tears filled his eyes, he tried to pull away from me. I didn’t know if it was shame from crying, or shame from what he was saying, or both. “I can’t.”
“You can’t what?” I asked desperately, trying to read between the lines.
He shook his head, freeing my hands from him before he kissed my fingertips and let them go completely. “You deserve to be happy, Giana. I want you to be happy. Just… move on. Go be with Shawn and—”
“I DON’T WANT TO BE WITH SHAWN,” I cried, pressing back into his space. I pushed up onto my toes, wrapped my arms around his neck and refused to leave any distance between us when I whispered, “I want to be with you.”
He cracked, a sob breaking through his veneer as I slammed my mouth over his, tasting the fresh tears there. His arms wrapped fully around me, and he kissed me like he fucking hated me, like I was the absolute bane of his existence.
And then, he pushed me back.
“I have to go,” he said, voice cracking as he went for the door.
“Whatever it is, whoever it is you think you’re helping, you’re breaking the promise you made to me,” I said to his back, and I knew I was right, knew I’d struck a nerve when he stopped abruptly, his back heaving with every breath.