Total pages in book: 129
Estimated words: 121233 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 606(@200wpm)___ 485(@250wpm)___ 404(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 121233 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 606(@200wpm)___ 485(@250wpm)___ 404(@300wpm)
Dad arched a brow that made me flush and look away, choosing not to elaborate on that.
“But I know him. I know him maybe better than any of his teammates. And I just… I can’t believe that suddenly, out of nowhere, he decided he wanted to be with Maliyah again. I mean, Dad… he was crying when he broke up with me.”
“Guys cry, too, you know,” he said with a smirk.
“Yes, but… it takes a lot,” I pointed out. “No?”
Dad nodded. “Yes, usually. But maybe he was just crying because he knew he was hurting you. He could very well want to end the relationship, but not want to bring you pain in the process.”
I frowned, deflating as I realized that was a possibility. “I guess I hadn’t thought of that.”
Dad patted my hand. “I know this is hard, little mouse. Believe it or not, I dated a few girls pretty seriously before I found your mom. I know what it’s like to have a heart broken.”
I folded in on myself, my heart squeezing painfully tight in my chest as if cued.
“But if Bonnie Raitt taught me anything, it’s that you can’t make someone love you if they don’t.”
“Wait,” I said. “That’s an Adele song.”
“She covered it.”
“Bonnie Raitt did?”
Dad blinked. “I’m going to choose to ignore the fact that my daughter doesn’t know who Bonnie Raitt is and get back to the matter at hand, which is this,” he said, leaning in closer. His blue eyes flashed with warmth, a sympathetic smile on the lips that mine were mirrored after. “At this point, it doesn’t matter what you think you know about what might be going on behind the scenes for this boy. All you have to go off is what actually happened, what he told you, and what you do know for certain.” He paused. “He looked you right in the eyes and told you it’s over.”
My bottom lip trembled, and Dad squeezed my hand.
“At some point, you have to accept that and move forward. I’m not saying you need to sprint, or that it’s not going to hurt every step of the way. But that’s what life is, sometimes. It’s just getting up, getting dressed, and putting one foot in front of the other until one day… the pain fades. And you know what else?”
“What?” I whispered.
“Life has a funny way of surprising us and bringing us something even better down the line.”
I swallowed, nodding, trying to find solace in his words. “I… I think I love him, Dad.”
My words broke at the end of the confession, tears blurring my eyes as I glanced up at my father who looked like I’d just fallen off a cliff right in front of his eyes.
“Oh, sweetheart,” he said, and in a flash, he was up out of his side of the booth and dipping into mine.
He wrapped me up in a fierce hug, one I felt all the way to my bones as I clung to him and let myself cry.
“It’s okay to love him.”
“Even if he doesn’t love me back?”
“That’s the thing about love,” he said, kissing my hair. “It doesn’t need to be reciprocated to be real.”
I couldn’t be sure how long we sat there, Dad holding me while I fell apart in a hole-in-the-wall restaurant full of rowdy college students, but I savored every moment of that comfort he brought me.
And the next morning, I woke up with the same excruciating agony that had plagued me since Clay broke my heart. But this time, I didn’t surrender to it. I didn’t overanalyze every word he’d said to me, or replay all the moments we spent in my bed. I didn’t cling to the memory of his laugh, or how I could still close my eyes and feel his hands on my face, his lips on my lips.
This time, I got dressed.
I put on my shoes.
And one slow step at a time, I moved forward.
Giana
A week later, I waited on the bench outside Rum & Roasters, tucking my peacoat tight around me against the chilly breeze. It was a poor choice to wear my tights and skirt today, but I missed skirt season. I was tired of wearing sweaters and pants, and I wanted to break out the whiskers skirt.
For reasons I probably would never admit to anyone, myself included.
So, I rubbed my legs through the thin fabric to try to bring a little warmth, eyes scanning the students walking by for Shawn. As soon as he got here, we could dip inside the coffee shop so I could defrost.
I didn’t know exactly why I had felt the need to call him, to ask him to meet up — but something about coming clean about everything felt like it would give me a little closure. I certainly wasn’t going to get anything close to closure from Clay, so maybe this was my heart’s desperate attempt to take back some of the control that had been stolen from me.