Total pages in book: 171
Estimated words: 162003 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 810(@200wpm)___ 648(@250wpm)___ 540(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 162003 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 810(@200wpm)___ 648(@250wpm)___ 540(@300wpm)
So with more strength than I felt, I pulled away and put myself together again. Ryland watched me carefully, and when I glanced out the window, I realized we were parked outside of my apartment already.
“Come home with me,” he begged.
I couldn’t look at him as my hand reached for the door handle. “I can’t, Ryland.”
“Brighton…” His voice filled with desperation. “I’ll never be able to sleep knowing you’re here. This is too much. I know you want to punish me, but…”
“I’m not punishing you,” I whispered. “I’m really not, Ryland. I forgive you for the accident, okay. And I’m grateful for what you’re doing for Norma. I… I honestly don’t even know what to say about it. But right now, it doesn’t change anything between us. You and Brayden…”
“I’m done with that,” he insisted. “What do I have to do to convince you?”
I glanced back into his tormented eyes and shook my head. I honestly didn’t know what he could do to convince me. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I would always be wondering. And if something happened to Brayden while I was with him, I would never forgive myself for it.
“There’s nothing you can do,” I answered. “I just need you to go home, Ryland. Go home and… live your life. The life you had before me.”
“There was nothing before you,” he protested. “And there’s nothing without you. Don’t you get that?”
He was getting frustrated. But that was good. It meant he believed this was what I wanted.
“Goodnight, Ryland.” I opened the door and stepped outside.
***
I was on the sofa, stuffing my face full of Wasabi chips when Nicole walked in.
She set her bags down on the counter and gave me a weird look. “You do know there’s a body guard outside the door, right?”
My head fell back against the sofa with a groan. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“Honestly…” Nicole muttered, “don’t hate me for saying this, but it kind of makes me feel a little better. There are some creepy guys hanging out in the hallway, and I hate walking past them.”
“I know,” I admitted. “You’re right. But if I accept this, then it’s just opening the door for him to keep doing stuff like this.”
“Yeah, I know.” She worried her lip between her teeth. “He’ll probably tell Matt about this now, and he’s going to freak. I bet you anything they team up on this.”
She looked hopeful, and I agreed with her. Of course, Matt cared about her, but Nicole was still trying to push him away at every opportunity she got. I didn’t understand it. After their last spat, she hadn’t heard from him in over two weeks.
She was moping around, pretending it didn’t bother her. And no matter how much I urged her, she wouldn’t call him. I guess I really didn’t have room to talk though.
I had a lot of thinking to do where Ryland was concerned. But for now, I refused to rush into any decisions.
Chapter Twelve
Brighton
Security didn’t even hesitate to let me into the building. I don’t know why that surprised me, but it did. They told me Ryland had a standing invitation for me and to go on up. I stepped off the elevator and walked down his hallway. The place was deserted, which was for the best. I didn’t need the other employees around for this.
It felt like a lifetime ago that I was here. The place seemed different in the dim evening lights. A sad, empty feeling filled the space that I’d spent so much time before. A glance at my desk, and I noticed there weren’t any personal mementos from whoever had taken over my position. It didn’t even look like it was being used.
Ryland’s door was cracked, and I peeked inside to find him sitting at his desk. He wasn’t working though. He was just leaning back with his head against the chair, staring at the ceiling. His eyes were shadowed by dark circles, and he looked exhausted.
I hated that. I hoped he was taking care of himself. I hoped that I wasn’t the cause of those dark circles. I pushed the door open, and his eyes shot to mine. They flickered with surprise, and then he was up, walking towards me before he could stop himself.
“Brighton?”
“I’m fine,” I assured him. “But I wanted to come and talk to you in person.”
“Okay.”
He took my hand and pulled me over to the sofa. I didn’t resist because it was good to feel his skin against mine. If only for a moment.
“What’s on your mind?” he asked.
He looked like he was choosing his words carefully. As though he were afraid anything he might say or do could scare me off. I hated that too. I didn’t want him to feel like that. Things were so complicated between us, and I honestly didn’t know where to begin.