Total pages in book: 52
Estimated words: 49949 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 166(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 49949 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 166(@300wpm)
“Oh, thanks, man, but I have a ton of shit to do tomorrow,” I lie.
“No problem. Oh, just so you know, Renee’s acceptance letter to Marymount College came in the mail today. I think she’s excited.”
I let out a sigh, doubting she is.
“That’s great news. I guess she’s going to school in the fall after all then.”
“Yeah, and she’s staying local, which makes me happy. I signed her up for a prep course this summer to help her prepare for the fall. I don’t think Renee has studied a day in her life, so she needs to get used to it,” Colt laughs.
“Oh…great,” I say blandly.
No matter how hard I try to sound happy for Renee, my voice remains the same: tired and emotionless.
“Give her a call later. I’m sure she’d love to hear your words of encouragement. I’m just her father; she doesn’t like listening to me,” Colt laughs. “But she trusts your opinion.”
“Okay, I’ll do that.”
After I hang up with Colt, I throw the phone across the room and grunt my frustration. How the fuck am I going to get through this? I’m not only going to have to distance myself from Renee, but from Colt too if I want her to live a normal life and move on.
Or maybe it’s just me who can’t move on. Part of the reason for my pushing Renee away was for her to be able to live a normal young adult life, but the thought of her getting over me and dating someone else rips me apart inside.
21
Renee
My suitcase sits on the floor as I think about what else I need to bring for this stupid college prep course Daddy signed me up for. I’ll be staying in New York City for a week, and I’m hoping the time away from Tarrytown will give me clarity. I need to work out a plan to tell my father about the baby.
There is no way I’m giving my child up. I figure I can make up a story about some boy in New York who knocked me up and doesn’t want anything to do with me or the baby. That way, Kane doesn’t have to be burdened, and I won’t ruin his friendship with my father.
Sitting down on my bed, I bring my knees up to my chest. I just want to cry. I’ve had to hide all of my emotions over the past couple of weeks, and it’s been incredibly difficult. Luckily, Dad has been working so much that during the day, I can cry my eyes out about my broken heart.
Not to mention the despair I’m feeling over the fact that I’m going to be a single mother. I know my father won’t abandon me when I need him the most, but he doesn’t have time to help me raise a baby. It will be just my son or daughter and me, trying to get through this together. The thought terrifies me, but at the same time, I’m excited to be a mother.
Even in a situation like this, I can’t imagine giving up my child, and that makes me all the more disgusted with my own mother for walking out on me when I was a baby. I can’t imagine what my father must have gone through, dealing with his own heartbreak while having to raise me.
Kane hasn’t called me or my father. Dad suspects Kane’s distance has to do with a new woman in his life. The thought of Kane avoiding me is way better than the idea of him with someone else. I can’t deal with that possibility right now.
The doorbell rings; I figure it’s Chastity. She’s been doing her best to cheer me up and get me to be social. Usually, things are the other way around. It’s always been me coaxing Chastity to go to parties or to the beach, but now that summer is here and her college plans are set, she’s been more carefree. Plus, I think she’s forcing herself to be more of a social butterfly in order to help me get out of my funk. Her plan is failing miserably, but I appreciate her efforts.
As I head downstairs, the doorbell rings again.
“Hold on,” I call out, jogging over to the door and opening it.
Kane is standing on my doorstep. It takes me a moment to process that it’s really him. He looks like he hasn’t shaved in weeks, or slept either, for that matter. He looks gaunt and sickly, which makes a flood of worry rush through me.
“Hey, Renee. Can I come in?”
“Y-yeah. Are you okay?” I ask as he walks through the door and I close it behind him.
Kane just shakes his head and stares at me with his weary blue eyes. I’m scared; I’m not used to seeing him so out of sorts.