Total pages in book: 25
Estimated words: 22917 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 115(@200wpm)___ 92(@250wpm)___ 76(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 22917 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 115(@200wpm)___ 92(@250wpm)___ 76(@300wpm)
“Who is this?” Beckett looks at me, and I come over beside him.
“It’s one of her friends. I don’t know her name.” I barely glance at her because my eyes are searching for Mara.
“Are you sure?” Beckett moves closer to the screen and then squints. “Wonder if I can have security check her ID.”
“Why would you do that?” Felipe turns to his best friend, but Beckett is staying quiet. “Hmm, interesting,” he muses.
“There,” I say, as I poke my finger against the screen.
“You found her?” Felipe asks, but I ignore him, because my total focus is on Mara.
And her tiny fucking dress.
Chapter Thirteen
Mara
“You all right?” Emma shouts over the music.
She’s swaying her hips in the shiny sequined dress, and it’s making the lights of the club bounce off it. She stands out like a bright beautiful star, and I know she’s doing this to cheer me up. I force a smile and match her moves to show my answer rather than lie. Fake it 'til you make it, I suppose?
The truth is no, I’m not sure I’ll ever be all right again. I went from thinking River wanted nothing to do with me when he remembered who my family was to then hearing him shout he loved me. I was on a cloud until all of it came crashing down. If this is all some mind game he’s trying to play with me, he’s won. He knows I always think the worst of everything, so did he go for that weakness? Maybe he knew it would hurt me the most to make my head spin.
When I try to think of it rationally, none of it makes sense, but then again, being rational was never my strong suit. River made me want to challenge it. For the first time in my life, I wanted to run after something and to face the fear that maybe not everything goes wrong.
With River, things were so right. When he kissed me, it was like he took me to a whole other world that was only ours. I kind of understand why Cillian took his bride off to the middle of nowhere. They could be on their own and forget about all the drama.
I ran after River to show him that I’d face my fears. I’d hoped that maybe he could look past all our family crap so the both of us might fight together. For each other. For us.
I fell in love with him as a little girl before I knew what that even meant. That day at the bakery shattered it, and I thought that dream of us being together was forever gone. I know some people might find it silly that I dreamed of being with River, but when you grow up with parents like mine, you get to see that kind of epic romance every day. I thought it could be real for me too.
The truth is, I was right. I saw his eyes in the bakery that day. I just didn’t want to truly face it. I believed all the lies he fed me about it being a misunderstanding because I wanted him so badly. All the while, he wanted me to be as far away from him as possible. Even if he was turned on, he was pissed about it. That might be where a small seed of revenge started to form for him. He could have hated that on some level he desired me.
“Mara?” Emma pushes.
My smile must have fallen while I was dancing. I was going through the motions but nothing more.
“It’s okay.” I shrug, knowing she’s trying really hard to cheer me up.
I don’t think clubbing is Emma’s thing either, but after we got back to her place and saw all her roommates, we both wanted out of there. I knew I couldn’t go back to my place. The scent of River would be everywhere, and I can’t face that right now. I swear I can still smell him on me even now. Plus some of my family might pop up if they hear what went down.
A bet. That’s all I was. How did I not see something was up after what happened at the bakery? I’m so stupid.
He twisted it all to lure me right into him. He made me feel desired and sexy. God, I bet all his talk about the things we’d been doing sexually wasn’t new to him too. Bullshit. That man got me off better than I can get myself there.
A hot rush of tears pushes forward because I don’t want to think about him with anyone else. It’s stupid, and I shouldn’t care. The River that I’m jealous over isn’t real. He made himself into what I wanted to try and win a bet. Was his reason to ruin me?
“We can go if you want!” she shouts over the music. I guess I really suck at hiding how I’m feeling. I’m about to tell her okay but catch some commotion behind her.