Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83394 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83394 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Why had we gone to the gym last night? But I’d gone with Darrel a few times before, was enjoying being physical outside of work again—until it all came crashing down.
The second I walked toward the gate leading to the backyard, Darrel came out. “What the hell was that? I’ve been losing my shit all damn night, man.”
My gaze found its way to his. “You know Jojo—Joey?”
He frowned. Nodded. “Yeah, he’s been working out there for a while. Took boxing lessons with a friend of mine.”
Boxing? Joey boxed?
“Does he have a…a significant other?” I asked, knowing the answer.
“Not that I’m aware of.”
“Has he ever?”
“I don’t know, man. What’s going on? You look like shit. I was scared to death last night.”
“What’s he do?” He was supposed to study astronomy and teach me all about the constellations, the wonders of the universe…
“He’s a mechanic.”
It was strange, the tingling sensation sweeping through me. Part of me wanted to smile, though I didn’t feel it. We’d both become mechanics? Even if that wasn’t what I was doing now. But the other part of me, the one that won out, made me close my eyes as I tried to fight the demons in my brain. There was nothing wrong with being a mechanic, but it wasn’t Joey.
But then, I didn’t know Joey anymore.
“And he boxes?”
“Yeah, knows some martial arts too. I’m not sure what. Every few months or so he comes in beat up as shit. To be honest, I wonder what he’s up to.”
No, no, no, no, no.
This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Dizziness swept over me. I almost went down, but then Darrel was there, catching me.
“Hey, shh. It’s okay.” He stroked my head, but I tried to fight my way out of his arms.
“I gotta go. I need to get ready for work.”
“You’re not going to work today. You can’t even stay on your feet. You’ve been up all night by the looks of it.”
“I can’t.” I shook my head. “I don’t call in. I can’t risk my job.”
“I called in for you, and your job is fine.”
He was nice, too nice. It made my stomach twist. I’d fucked up not only my life, but Joey’s too. I didn’t deserve nice.
Still, I didn’t move, didn’t pull away.
“I loved him. I ruined him,” was all I could manage to say.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Joey
Comfortable bed. Thick, fluffy blankets around me. A warm body next to my aching one. I hated that I’d come here. They shouldn’t have to deal with my shit, but they did; they always did.
“Hey,” Angie said from beside me.
“I should go.” She had a baby and a husband to worry about.
“Oh no you don’t.” Angie put a hand on my side, and I flinched. “Shit. Sorry.”
“It’s fine. I’m sorry you have to see me like this.” Outside of the occasional black eye, I made sure Angie and Kev didn’t see me after a fight, but I couldn’t go home. I needed them.
“What happened?”
I’d stumbled to their house last night, bruised but wouldn’t say how, and I still wouldn’t. All I told them was Gage was back, that I’d seen him.
“Nothing.”
“He’s really here?”
I nodded.
“How did he look?”
“Grown up. Harder. More muscular.” Beautiful. Broken. “Hair’s shorter.”
Angie pulled me closer, and I let her. She wrapped her arm around me, fingered my hair. “I hate this. I hate seeing you like this. It’s so hard not to remember the boy you were when I see how much the man you’ve become has changed. You were so sweet…all heart and kindness and full of dreams.”
“I was stupid.”
“You gave me hope, did you know that? I wouldn’t be here, with Kevin and happy, if it wasn’t for you. Seeing you with Gage made me want it, but I was still scared. Watching you lose him showed me that was scarier.”
I rolled closer, wrapped an arm around her waist. “You always deserved to be happy.”
“You do too.” Maybe I did, but that hadn’t been the hand life dealt me.
“I need to see him.” I nodded, knowing she would say that. “You need to talk to him.” I knew she’d say that too. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
I didn’t move, just let her hold me, and thought about him.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Gage
I wasn’t surprised when Romeo found me. He’d apparently spent the whole day at the gym, hoping to see me or Darrel. I wasn’t stepping foot in that place again, so it hadn’t been me. He’d asked around to find out who Darrel was, and when he’d come in, he’d approached him, said he was an old friend of mine.
Darrel called me, put him on the phone, and now I was pulling up in front of their house.
I hadn’t said yes right away. My instinct was to get the hell out of there, but…I hadn’t been able to say no. I wanted to see him. I wanted to see Mouse. I wanted to find out about Jojo.