Total pages in book: 123
Estimated words: 115833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 579(@200wpm)___ 463(@250wpm)___ 386(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 115833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 579(@200wpm)___ 463(@250wpm)___ 386(@300wpm)
“Davina, this isn’t busying yourself. This is distracting yourself.”
“Well, it’s better that than being at home with all the curtains drawn and bottles of wine in rotation,” I said, clicking through one of the folders with my computer mouse. I cut my eyes at her. She had her arms folded and a dip in her brow. “Wanna catch me up to speed?”
“I don’t like that you’re back. I was actually going to come see you tonight and bring Chinese food.”
“Well, how about you have the Chinese delivered here later, because it’s going to be a long day. We need to get the rebranding party squared away. I know the caterer we hired had a tight schedule, so let’s reach out to her about the menu, because we have a lot of vegans and she’s really good. We’ll work through the list for final touches and then get in touch with Kenji to go over the photos that’ll be on display for the slideshow.”
I purposely avoided my friend’s eyes as I clicked away on my keyboard.
After a few seconds of silence, Tish asked, “What is this really about, Davina?”
“It’s not about anything.” I forced a laugh to prove to her that I was fine, but she wasn’t buying it. Her eyes narrowed as she scanned me like paper in a Xerox machine.
“Are you really going to make me say it?”
I stopped typing with a sigh. “Say what?”
“You aren’t properly grieving, Vina. You’re just burying yourself with work to disassociate with your feelings. You’re my girl, and I love you, but I have to be honest. You need to take your ass back home and sit with your feelings. You lost your husband, Davina. Your life partner. That’s not something you just get over in months.”
I folded my arms right along with her. I wanted her to cave, to yield, but Tish was just like Octavia—stubborn as hell and always getting her way.
Or maybe I was just too damn soft.
When I realized I wouldn’t win the silent battle, I sucked my teeth and dropped my arms. “Well, since you want to be honest with me, I’m going to be completely honest with you. Everything in that house reminds me of Lew, and spending so much time there is killing me. It makes me want to sleep all day, to drink all day, and I thought I wanted the time off, but it’s not healthy for me to be there for hours staring at our pictures or sniffing his hoodies.” I paused, looking away. “And sometimes I—I get this feeling that I might—” I clamped my mouth shut, shaking my head.
“Might what?” she asked, her forehead creasing with concern.
“That I might fall into a really ugly depression that I won’t be able to pull myself out of. I feel like the walls are closing in, Tish. Like I can’t breathe sometimes.” She started to say something, but I raised a hand and said, “Yes, I’m still taking my medication. Look, if I stay there all day, no one will ever see me. I’ll never leave. I’ll turn into a shell of myself, just like I did when my daddy died.”
I dragged in a breath. Oh, God. Now I was bringing my dad into this. No, I couldn’t do that here. Not right now. Talking about Lewis was already hard enough.
Tish stared at me a beat longer before finally dropping her arms and breathing hard through her nose. She then walked into my office and spread her arms wide open. I stood up so I could step into them and hug her.
“Ugh. I love you, Vina,” she murmured over my shoulder. “I don’t agree that you should be working right now, but I get it.” She leaned back and clutched my upper arms. “But you have to promise me you’ll take breaks and that you’ll leave this office by seven this whole week.”
“Okay.” I laughed. “I will.”
“I mean it! Okay? And I’ll be checking on you every twenty minutes while you work, just to make sure you’re good. Got it?”
“All right, all right.” I fought a smile.
Tish gave me a thorough once-over before releasing my arms. She caught me up to speed, and I was grateful she let it go, but just because I promised her I’d leave work at seven, it didn’t mean I couldn’t take my work home with me.
Around seven o’clock, Tish reminded me that she was coming to my house with dinner after she changed into more comfortable clothes at home. I figured this would give me an hour or so to keep working.
As soon as I got home, I sat at the dining table and opened my laptop. I finished up an email with Kenji and confirmed photos for the slideshow that would be shown at the rebranding party, then responded to my primary investor, Chester Hughes, who was being surprisingly nice to me via email.