Total pages in book: 123
Estimated words: 115833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 579(@200wpm)___ 463(@250wpm)___ 386(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 115833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 579(@200wpm)___ 463(@250wpm)___ 386(@300wpm)
“Javier,” I grumbled. “Get out of my way.”
“If you do not like what she has to say after you hear her out, you can walk away and I won’t stop you again,” he went on, holding steady. “It is that simple. If you decide to walk, I will promise to never interfere with your relationships again. But right now, because I am your friend and because I care about what is best for you, I really think you should stick around and listen.”
I looked down, and there was a mixture of shock and fear in Aleesa’s eyes as she stared at me.
“Dee, wha’ happen? Dee okay?” she asked in a soft whimper. Guilt ate me alive. She was so young. So innocent. She didn’t understand what was going on—this animosity taking over her own home.
“I’m okay, Aleesa.” I gripped her little chin and forced a smile. I had to calm down. I was scaring her.
I focused on Javier again. “I just do not want you to have any regrets,” he said.
I wanted to ask Davina if she regretted when she walked out the fucking door, but instead I exhaled and took a step back.
“Fine.”
Javier slipped his feet into athletic slides and hiked Aleesa higher up his hip. “I will take Aleesa for a walk, give you two a moment.”
“Thank you, Javier,” Davina said, and I hated that my heart betrayed me by beating faster at the sound of her voice.
When Javier left, it was just us in his oversize living room. I turned to face the woman who’d broken my heart, and she took a step toward me. She looked good, even in something as simple as jeans and a halter-top shirt. Curls dangled around her ears, the rest pulled up into a puffy bun, diamond studs in her ears.
Light poured through the blocky windows above, beaming down on her and making her look like a damn angel. It was becoming really hard to stay mad at her when she looked like that.
“Look, I know I’m the last person you want to see right now,” Davina said, and I loosely folded my arms, clinging to my guard. “I know that I hurt you, and I never should’ve walked away like I did at the lake. I was just scared, and I kept telling myself that you deserved better than me—which I still believe—but I wasn’t looking at the bigger picture. I was only focusing on my pain and what’d happened to me. I wasn’t thinking about a future, because I didn’t care about the future. I—I was stuck in the moment and only thinking about myself, and that wasn’t fair to you. I was so selfish, Deke. So damn selfish.” She took a few steps closer, making the space between us smaller. I could smell her now, vanilla and shea butter. Warm and familiar. “I just wanted to come to you, like you came to me all those times before, to tell you that I’m sorry and that I’m here.”
I dropped my arms. “Oh, you’re here? Now, after stomping on my heart and leaving it there to rot?”
“I know, I know, and I’m so sorry,” she pleaded, another inch closer. “You’re such a good guy, Deke. You’re so kind and respectful and hilarious, and I love that about you. And with all the time that has passed since the lake, I realize just how much I miss you being in my life! I had time to think about everything the last few weeks, and it hit me—like really hit me—that I would not have made it through the end of that sad, selfish season of my life without you. I never would’ve pushed through. I would’ve willingly remained stuck. Yes, I had my family and my best friend, but you checked on me every day. You made me smile every single day. You put me first, even when you had other places to be and other things to do. You were there for me so many times, and I didn’t appreciate it in the moment . . . and I guess I didn’t trust it or you because I didn’t know what you were after, but I see the truth now. I can see it just like I saw it in your eyes on that dock.”
She was right in front of me now, taking my hands in hers and holding them tight. Her eyes shimmered like she wanted to cry, and I wanted to pull her into my arms and kiss those tears away as soon as they fell.
Still, I remained stubborn.
“You said you were in love with me, so I came here to let you know my truth. I love you, Deke Bishop,” she said with a breath of elation. “I’m in love with you, too, and I know it, because I can never get you out of my head. I crave your presence more every day, and believe me, my chest hurts, too, when I’m away from you. I’ve tried fighting that ache, but it’s impossible. I resisted for so long because I didn’t understand how it could be, you know? How I could love two men with one heart, even when the other is gone. I didn’t think it was possible or that I could feel so much with another man so quickly, but I felt it all and possibly even more with you.”