Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 61942 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 310(@200wpm)___ 248(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 61942 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 310(@200wpm)___ 248(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
Before Laura could fully wake up, I took him into my arms and carried him outside, his favorite place to be. I took him into the sunshine as I bobbed him up and down, turning his cries to little giggles.
He smiled at me.
I smiled back.
Laura followed me outside a moment later. “How’d it go?”
“Good. He said he would teach me the ropes.”
“That’s nice.”
“And then one day, I’ll be able teach you the ropes, son.” I looked at Demetri, who smiled every time I gave him attention.
Laura covered her mouth as she gave a yawn. “Do you mind if I take a nap? He was up all night.”
“No problem.”
“Thank you.” She directed my face to hers and kissed me. “I love you.” She patted my chest and walked back to the house.
I watched her go. “I love you too…”
I unlocked the screen and showed him the pictures in the bar.
Benton smiled. “Looks just like you.”
“I know he does.” I realized it the first time I saw him. Dark hair. Dark eyes. And he was a long kid, which told me he would be tall.
Benton swiped through more photos before he handed back the phone. “That’s a good-looking kid.”
“I know,” I said, a note of pride to my voice.
“How’s Laura?”
“Happy. Already talking about the second one.”
“You want another one?” he asked.
I gave a nod. “Wouldn’t mind it.”
“So, you still hate kids?” He grinned, enjoying the taunt.
I took a drink and ignored what he said.
“That’s what I thought.”
“It was hard in the beginning. Living in a new place. Stepping down at work. Having nothing to do. But it got easier.”
“And Demetri gives you a new kind of purpose.”
“Yeah…he does.”
“How long are you in town?”
“Just for a couple days. Have to manage a few things. I would have brought them with me, but Demetri is so young, it’s easier to keep him in one place.”
“I understand,” he said. “Well, I’m happy for you.” He clapped me on the shoulder. “I never imagined you as a husband and father, but now I can’t imagine you being anything but.”
I sat at the table alone, a cup of coffee in front of me along with some scones I wouldn’t eat. My eyes immediately went to them when they walked in the door. There were four of them, a mother and father with two grown kids.
Some of them were married, so they’d brought their spouses along.
They gathered at a table, ordered their coffees and pastries, and soon the table erupted into loud bursts of laughter.
I sat there and watched it all.
A life that could have been mine.
When I looked at my father, I saw features similar to my own, but I had my mother’s eyes. They were both tall, so it was hard to tell whose height I’d inherited. Eventually, the waitress brought out a small cake with a single candle in the middle.
They sang happy birthday.
The cake ended up in front of my father.
They all sang, and then he blew out the candles. He turned fifty-five.
Their evening eventually wrapped up, and after presents were opened, they left the table and gathered outside to say their goodbyes. His son and his wife left. Then his daughter walked off.
It was just the two of them.
I left my table and walked outside. They seemed to be waiting for a cab because their apartment was several blocks away. My mother raised her arm to get the attention of a taxi, but he drove right by.
I moved to the edge of sidewalk, raised my hand, and immediately got a cab to pull over. I opened the back door and held it open for them. “You guys take it.”
“Oh, that’s so nice,” my mother said. “But we couldn’t.”
“Please,” I said as I stepped out of the way. “Happy birthday.”
My dad smiled when he heard me say that. “Well, thanks.”
I stared him down, hoping he would recognize me, that he would recognize his own blood, but he didn’t. “No problem, Dad.”
He was just about to turn to the cab when he jerked back toward me. Now he stared at me with a mixture of both fear and terror, like the past he’d been evading all his life had finally caught up with him. His breaths deepened and shortened, and his eyes flicked back and forth as he looked at my features.
My mother was frozen too.
My dad finally spoke. “Ryan…?”
“Yes.”
Still in disbelief, he just stared, at a loss for words. “I…I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say—”
“I’ve watched you my entire adult life. Watched you interact with your kids. Watched my birthday come and go without any acknowledgment. Watched the life I could have had from across the street.”
“We tried to find you—”
“No, you didn’t. And that’s okay. I don’t want to be somewhere I’m unwanted.”
My mother grabbed his arm to steady him.
“I’m not going to watch you anymore. I’m not sad about the life I lost. I’m married now. I have a son. I have my own family. I just wanted you to know that I’m here, that what you did was unspeakable, and you’re the ones who missed out on a relationship with me. As a father myself, I don’t know how you could possibly justify what you did. But none of that matters anymore.”