Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 61942 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 310(@200wpm)___ 248(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 61942 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 310(@200wpm)___ 248(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
“I want to be with you—whatever your terms may be.”
My eyes flicked back and forth, excited but also confused. “I…I don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand?”
“You just…changed your mind?”
“I realized any life with you is better than the one I have by myself.”
“But you don’t want kids. You made that very clear.”
He stared at me for a while, not blinking. “I feel differently now.”
“Why?”
“Because I do.”
Something didn’t feel right. It was too easy. “You told me you hate kids.”
“And you made me realize I’m just scared of them—”
“You told me if we ever had a kid, you wouldn’t even be there when they were born—”
“Laura.” He winced when I repeated his words. “I remember what I said. You don’t need to remind me. I don’t want that to be the reason we aren’t together. Whenever that time comes in our lives, I’ll do my best to be ready for it, to be the best father I can be. I’m willing to try for you.”
It still didn’t feel right. Never once had Bartholomew ever even remotely entertained the idea, and now here he was, with a complete change of heart. I studied his face, searched for answers in his eyes, his expression, but I didn’t find anything.
But then…it hit me.
The reason he’d shown up at my apartment out of the blue…was because he knew.
He knew. “No…”
“What?”
“This is not how I wanted it to be.”
His eyes narrowed and his face hardened.
“This is not the love story I want…”
“Laura—”
“Get out.”
“I’m not leaving. Not this time. Not ever.”
“I gave you the opportunity to choose me for love, not obligation. You made that choice, and now you have to stick with it.”
“I’m not here out of obligation—”
“Yes, you are. That’s the only reason you came to my front door.”
“Laura, I could have just gone about my life without a care. I didn’t have to come here. I didn’t have to care. But I’m here because I do care, because I don’t want my kid to have a stepfather, because I don’t want my kid to know what it’s like to know their father doesn’t give a shit whether they’re dead or alive.”
I stepped back, my privacy violated, my world upended.
“Sweetheart—”
“No. I know how you really feel.”
“And those feelings changed the instant I knew,” he snapped. “That’s how it works, right? You aren’t ready to be a parent until you’re forced to be a parent. You don’t know how it really feels to have a kid until that moment is upon you. I know how I feel now. I want to do this with you.”
My arms crossed over my chest, and I stepped back.
“You know what I said to Benton when he was having a kid?”
“You told him to get her an abortion.”
“Which is an option for us since we’re still in the first trimester.”
My eyes narrowed on his face.
“Have I said that?”
“Because you know I would say no.”
“I have no idea how you feel about this, Laura. Because we haven’t talked about it. Because you didn’t tell me. And no, I haven’t suggested it because I would never let anything happen to our son or daughter. How can I hate something that’s half you?”
I looked away.
“Laura—”
“You say this now, but you’ll leave eventually… You’ll leave when things get hard. And I can’t deal with that. I’d rather you not be a part of this than watch you abandon us later.”
He cocked his head slightly as he stared at me.
The stare was so intense I looked away.
“When have I not been loyal to you?”
I kept my eyes on the floor.
“I sacrificed everything for you, Laura. I let my men die for you. When Silas came for you, I killed him and all the rest. When this relationship failed, I bought you this apartment so you’d never have to sleep in that tainted place. I’ve always been loyal to you. And I will remain loyal to you through this.”
“I don’t want loyalty, Bartholomew. I want us to be in love—”
“We are in love.”
“And we’re growing our family…and we’re so excited for it. I don’t want the man I love to come back because he has to. I don’t want a promise he’ll stay…because if we were happy, that promise wouldn’t need to be made in the first place.”
He turned quiet.
“I just…don’t want it to be this way.”
He stayed quiet.
I looked at him, seeing his focused stare.
“No, it’s not in the way that you described, but I think it’s more profound. If it weren’t, I wouldn’t be here right now. The second I knew, all those misgivings and fears vanished. I knew I was fully invested in this. I knew I wanted to be with you every day for the rest of my life. I knew I wanted to be the father to this kid, not someone else. All my priorities changed in an instant. I think that’s a better story than the one you imagined.”