Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 87284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 436(@200wpm)___ 349(@250wpm)___ 291(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 436(@200wpm)___ 349(@250wpm)___ 291(@300wpm)
Ty folded his arms over his chest and leaned back against the sink. He smiled a little again. “I don’t have to imagine.”
Right. He was living my dream. Lucky bastard.
“In other words, I wanna be you when I grow up,” I joked.
His eyes flashed with amusement. “It’ll be difficult to fit five snakes and a Sir on a boat this size. You’ll need something bigger.”
I shrugged and removed my backpack. “I can make it work with the snakes. The Sir is less important. He’ll have his own place. I’m not a relationship guy—unless it’s a relationship like the one I have with Macklin.”
“You two are casual, then?”
Sort of? “We’re equal parts protective of each other and our personal lives, I’d say.” I looked behind me; lying down was so tempting, but I wouldn’t get up again. I’d fall asleep. “But between you and me? I think he needs his ex-husband as his primary partner. And I need someone who…” I blew out a breath and shook my head. “That’s a longer story.”
I was the masochist who hated to feel unnerved and anxious in my everyday life but got off hard on fear play and being toyed with mentally. Not much unlike a rape victim being into rape play. Because in kink, we had the control to say stop. To call red.
“Give me the CliffsNotes,” Ty requested.
I furrowed my brow and looked over at him. Why did he want the CliffsNotes? Why did he care?
But okay. Um, the abridged version still wouldn’t be very short. Unless—well, I could cut some things, and if he wanted to know more, he could ask. Keeping it brief was important to me because I knew how people functioned. They lost interest very quickly, and then I’d feel like shit for boring them.
“I have ADHD,” I stated. That revelation didn’t cause so much as a twitch in Ty’s expression. “For my well-being’s sake, I lead my life pretty carefully. I’m not the most flexible with my time, I need to feel prepared, and I require structure.” I swallowed and was not surprised at all to feel my stomach tightening with discomfort. Being vulnerable was torture. “At the same time, I crave organized chaos. I’m into some hardcore kinks—like, you know, takedowns, primal play, consensual non-con. Stuff like that. And I don’t find my assertiveness to the same degree outside a good kink relationship. That’s where I want to let go completely and sort of leave humanity behind.” In other words, I wanted a solid kink arrangement—just no love and shit.
Ty lifted a brow slightly. “Interesting.”
Oh, I wasn’t done. “Also at the same time, there’s an exception to every rule,” I went on. “I jumped on a plane with Macklin to come here on less than twenty-four-hours’ notice—because I happened to be in the mood to get out of the cold. But ask me in that same short time to go see my parents…? I’d probably panic—and I love my folks. But anyway. I handle my everyday life fine on my own. I don’t want to expose an outsider to my, uh, complicated order. So, yeah, in kink, that’s where I want my chaos, and those’re the types of arrangements I’m into.”
“Hm.” He scratched his chin absently. “Does that ever work? Splitting your life into pieces and categories? I’ve found that the pieces eventually blend together.”
I’d like to try.
“I’ve had some success,” I replied carefully. “For short-term relationships, anyway.”
“And you’re not interested in long-term?”
“It’s not on my radar, no,” I said.
He nodded once in acknowledgment. “One more question. Where do I know you from?”
For chrissakes!
He had to let that go!
I forced myself to chuckle, hoping I came off as casual and amused. “I don’t freaking know. I don’t remember you.”
Lies, lies, lies.
It felt weird to have dinner in nothing but a pair of shorts, so I changed again once Ty had returned to the house. It wasn’t exactly hot outside at this hour either, just comfortably warm for a pair of nicer shorts—and a Ralph Lauren tee. My grandmother in Denmark sent Corey and me the same Christmas gift most years. Danish treats and Ralph Lauren tees. She thought they made us look dapper. Or smuk, in her words.
Then I went back to the house too, wondering what was taking Macklin so long. I wasn’t dragging his fifty-pound suitcase to the boat if he got wasted before seeing the damn thing.
Ty and the Tenley twins were drinking beer and throwing meat on the grill when I opened the gate, and I was greeted by an excited Terra.
“Hi, beautiful girl.” I reached down and patted her head. “Have you seen my boyfriend?”
Shay answered as he came out with a stack of plates. “He’s upstairs with Colt, and he asked me to tell you to go up there when you got back.”