Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 97275 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 486(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97275 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 486(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 324(@300wpm)
Payton’s face was a deep reddish hue, and I was still gasping for air, trying to obtain composure, but it was a losing battle. “T-that w-was a-awesome!” I gasped and laughed.
“What’d she do?” Tony asked while talking to Payton’s grandmother.
“She farted in my mouth!” Bennett moaned from the other room. “I need CPR!”
“Payton!” Jessie said sharply.
“What?” She asked innocently.
“What have I told you about doing that? That’s disgusting and rude.” She chided.
“I can still taste it!” Bennett shrieked.
Tears returned to rolling down my cheeks as I laughed. I’d almost had it back under control until he’d said that last part.
“She’s always been a gassy one,” Tony exclaimed as he set a pan of lasagna onto the kitchen table. “Bennett, quit your bitching and get in here. Dinner’s ready.”
Payton buried her face in her hands, and I threw my arm around her shoulders as I sat down next to her. Giving her a kiss on the forehead, we all dug in. Death threats withstanding, it was a nice dinner. It was also bittersweet. I wished like hell that my parent’s were here today. To meet their children’s loved ones, grandchildren, and the new family that would soon be joined to mine.
The ride home I kept a vigilant eye on the road, and my thoughts kept straying back to my parents. Payton’s family reminded me of what I didn’t have. What I would never have again. My children would never meet my parents. They’d never get to see them. My father didn’t get to walk his daughter down the aisle. He didn’t get to see Ember graduate from high school or college. Didn’t make it to my Ranger school graduation. Weren’t there when I was injured in Iraq. Not there for the birth of their first grandchild.
I went through the nightly routine of making all the doors and windows were locked. I fed Alpha, set out my clothes for tomorrow, plugged my phone in, checked to make sure my gun was loaded and under my pillow, and I cleaned up. What I didn’t do was speak since we’d left her parents’ house. Which must have seriously freaked her out because she burst after I’d been lying in bed for a long time thinking about how different life would be if I’d had had my parents here right now.
“I’ll never do it again!” She cried and covered her face with the pillow.
I looked at her quizzically. “Do what?” I asked her pillow.
“Be nasty. I wasn’t even thinking.” She mumbled into her pillow.
“Can we name the baby Thurston if it’s a boy?” I asked.
The pillow lowered from her face and she turned to look at me. “Thurston?”
“That was my father’s name.” I said quietly.
Her eyes dilated, and she scooted closer to me. “Will you tell me about them?”
My heart seized in my chest. I’ve avoided it for the past year now. She’d asked, and I changed the subject. She didn’t push because that wasn’t the type of person she was. She was patient and persistent when she needed to be. She’d waited for me to be ready, but hell, I might never be.
Taking a deep breath, I told her about them.
“My mother’s name was Adeline. They were great parents. The type who let you do whatever you wanted, within reason. They didn’t care if James or I had a beer at the house. They took all of my friends in as if they were one of their own. When they died, it was my fault.”
She snorted in disbelief, and I closed my eyes.
“They were on the way home after seeing me graduate from boot camp. They’d spent two of their four-day vacation with my grandparents, and then came to see me. I was staying so I could start Ranger school, and we knew it would be another sixty-one days before they would see me again, so they flew to where I was, and then they left the next day. I wasn’t slated to start the school for another week, but I’d asked them to go home so I could have some fun. It was the worst mistake of my life.”
“Oh, honey. That wasn’t your fault. You’d just gone through boot camp. You deserved to let loose, and from what I understood, y’all were near Vegas. Who the heck wouldn’t have wanted to go play instead of hanging with their parents? Especially one that was about to start another school that would take every bit of your mental capacity to get through?” She said softly.
She didn’t touch me though. She must have known I would never get it out if she touched me. Squeezing my eyes tightly shut, I replayed how the next few hours after their departure went.
“I was at a fucking strip club when one of the Army officers that helped trained us came in. We started to give him shit for being there, but then the look on his face registered and we all fell silent. He walked right up to me, and tore my heart apart. While I was in a fucking strip club watching the girls dance on stage, my parents died in a plane crash. The one I insisted they go home on.”
“Max, didn’t you just tell me they only had four days, and they’d already spent two with your grandparents and one with you? They would have had to leave eventually.” She said trying to condone my actions.
“Yeah, but they weren’t going on that flight. I told them to leave. The boys were going to be leaving by eight, and I wanted to go with them. I practically shoved them out the door.”
I felt a drop hit my cheek and my eyes opened in a flash to see tears pouring down Payton’s face, running down her neck and disappearing behind the t-shirt she was wearing. She was leaning over me looking so mad that she could spit nails.
“This is not your fault!” She yelled.
“Well, whose is it if not mine?” I queried.
“Obviously it was no ones. It was a fluke of nature. Stop beating yourself up.” She demanded.