Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 64929 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 325(@200wpm)___ 260(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 64929 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 325(@200wpm)___ 260(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
Not sexual, my ass — and I couldn’t help but snort quietly to myself at my own thought. I’d avoided him since, which hadn’t been too difficult. He left before I got up, and I got back after he’d gone to bed. I had run and run, but I was miserable. I didn’t want to avoid Adrian forever, but he probably thought I was a fucking pervert. I shouldn’t have admitted the things I had.
I tried to make up for it, in my own way. A few extra crumpled-up dollars from where I’d worked overtime on top of the power bill, dinner for him to reheat on the stove… Then there was tonight. My palms were sweating as I took the leash out of the bag, and I didn’t know what the hell I’d been thinking when I’d bought it — or what he’d think. If he assumed it was mockery, that would probably be best.
I ripped the price tag off, coiled it neatly on the table, and scrawled a note: for your research. I berated myself the whole way back to my room, shaking my head as I wandered into the bathroom to shower. As much as I tried, I couldn’t shake the sight of him wearing the collar with that plug in his hand. I wondered how it would feel to have the end of the leash in my hand.
I groaned, sagging against the wall of the shower, my hand sliding up and down my cock. It wouldn’t hurt to get off; maybe then I’d stop thinking about sex. I tilted my head back and closed my eyes. Images flashed through my mind, and no matter how much I tried, I couldn’t filter them out. I stopped trying, just giving in to get it over with, to get it out of my system.
And I thought about him there, naked but for the collar; I imagined what he’d look like with the tail in his ass. The shower washed away the evidence of my shame, and I couldn’t help the guilt as I stepped out of the tub. I dried off and loosely draped the towel around my waist. My head was clearer, and it didn’t hurt that I’d just gotten off.
What did hurt was the fact that I almost ran right into Adrian when I took a step into the hallway. “Oh, I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t… I wasn’t watching where I was going.” Adrian took a hurried step back and started looking around at the walls and the floor and eventually the ceiling — anywhere but at me.
“Yeah, no worries,” I said, fidgeting with the towel around my waist. Good thing I’d gotten that out of my system, or it would’ve been painfully clear that I was responding to the sight of him.
“Why don’t we clean out Mom and Dad’s room?” I blurted out.
Perfect. No more arousal, no more decent mood, nothing. I always did know what to say. Adrian’s face went white. “Do we… I mean… We can…” He stopped and took a deep breath before finally turning to look at me. “Do we have to? I know we do eventually, but it feels…”
It was clear from the look on his face how hard even the thought of it was. “I guess so.” He closed his eyes for just a moment. It looked like he was having an internal debate or talking himself up to it. “Do you have to work Saturday morning or night?”
“Evening shift. I’ll be home late.” It wasn’t my favorite time to work, but once it got late, it wasn’t that bad. Sometimes I even managed to study. “Then how about we work on it Saturday morning? I have to be at the accounting office after classes for the next couple of days, but I’ll be free by then.” Adrian finally looked over at me, barely making eye contact. Instead, his eyes went to the tattoos on my arms and shoulder, though he looked away just as quickly.
Yeah, he probably didn’t approve.
“That’ll work.”
I briefly felt a flash of guilt for forcing this on him, but at the same time… It had to be done. And as much as I hated myself for thinking it, we might find a few things we could pawn — because Adrian’s savings account was dwindling to nothing, and it wasn’t like my crappy job or his internship paid well.
I wasn’t going to mention that to him.
It was almost — almost — funny that the logical brother wasn’t the one being rational and moving ahead. No, the emotional wreck and pain in the ass was. Because I was so fucking damaged, and it was the only way I could cope. I ran, and not just physically. Running almost always got rid of reminders of the past as well. It just hurt too much to have to see them every day.